Dear me from last year,

I know you're afraid right now. You've done it again and you just can't seem to stop. What the hell are you going to do?! It's panic time and you're sick to your stomach. You can't take this anymore and yet you're afraid that the next paycheque you get, you'll do it all again. You've screwed up one credit card & you're at the limit with 2 more, 2 overdrafts & a line of credit. You've also got a payday loan outstanding. You're in over your head and there's no light at the end of the tunnel.

What have you done?! What are you going to do?! You feel sick and desperate and you JUST CAN'T STOP!

I know because I'm you. Been there. Done that. And I want you to believe me, it's going to be alright because you're going to stop cold turkey. You're going to face this monster addiction and you're going to try to find that light at the end of the tunnel (even if you doubt it exists). You're going to take it day by day. You're going to acknowledge that you're just a man. Not Superman. You're flawed and you can be weak. It's allowed. You're also a decent person and you can be strong. You're allowed to acknowledge that too.

And guess what? You're going to do it! You're going to be seriously paying down your debt WHILE having all your bills paid every month and lots of food and living expenses on top. You're going to sleep again and wake up without that throbbing sense of doom that stress brings. You're going to forget what it's like to rush out on payday to pay off your payday loan and then re-loan in order to pay off other debt like a chicken with his head cut off. You're going to live again. You're going to smile again. You're going to be you again.

As an added bonus, you're going to be proud of yourself for facing down a monster and proving you CAN be a hero when you need to be. And the best part of all is you're going to discover compassion for others who are in the same boat you were. You're going to learn so much about yourself from the generous sharing of stories from those others. You're going to find strength and you're going to share it. You're going to let your story be known and you're going to do it with humility and honesty. You're also going to be amazed not only at how easy it is to share, but how spectacularly freeing it is too. You're starting a journey that carries with it only one regret - that you didn't start earlier. How's that for a great review of a journey?

I guess what I'm saying is you're going to make it. Let go of the stress. Let go of the panic. Let go of the depression. You're. Going. To. Make. It. And you're going to write yourself a letter a year or so from now to remind yourself and hopefully others, that nothing is impossible if you try and that if one person can do it, EVERY person can do it. You just have to trust in yourself that you can live by one incredibly simple rule.

Today I will not gamble. Never again.

Dear me from TWO years ago...

What he said.

PS: It just gets better and better! YOU ARE SO GOING TO DO THIS!