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Anyone else find it hard to break up?

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Anyone else find it hard to break up?

Postby Cantkillme » Sun Aug 23, 2020 6:47 pm

I want to end my relationship with my girlfriend, but I can't because I feel sorry for her because she has her own mental illness. But I can't stay with her.
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Re: Anyone else find it hard to break up?

Postby LonelyMe » Sun Aug 23, 2020 8:22 pm

Cantkillme, I think that your problem is not that uncommon. I don’t have this problem at the moment, but I have been in some relationships with men who had issues, while I had my own. I think that breaking up abruptly can have serious consequences on the person who is struggling. If there is no feeling, then there is no point in dragging the relationship. However, it would be good to still offer the support to her or direct her somewhere. Please be caring and considerate to people who are struggling. They might need your help one way or another.
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Re: Anyone else find it hard to break up?

Postby tmc115 » Tue Nov 24, 2020 1:18 pm

Don't pity date her. Regardless of whether or not she has a mental disorder she should be respected. Give her a chance to be strong. Tell her it's over and why. Maybe what you are having problems with is related to problems she's had in the past and if you tell her then maybe she can improve herself. But if all you do is hide the truth she never has a chance.

When we say we can't because the other person is blahblahblah, what we are actually saying is, "I'm too afraid of dealing with the consequences. I don't want to be the bad guy. I don't want to be yelled at."

Well, if you are being the bad guy maybe you get yelled at. If you say hurtful stuff it may hurt them. But time will pass and in the end you've given them information to review. They might be upset in the moment, but later they might thank you for your honesty (and bravery).
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