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Is he trying to stay out of it? *may trigger*

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Is he trying to stay out of it? *may trigger*

Postby corruptedlungs » Mon May 15, 2017 2:27 am

So, last year I dated a customer for a bit from the bar I worked at. Everyone used to joke that he was a "psychopath". It fell apart because i assumed he was a jerk from the get go and was not in a good place. I have recently realized based off of our interactions and his medication that he might actually be austistic.

I stopped working at this place and visited early this year. Long story short one of my old coworkers sexually assaulted me and everyone there is siding with him. (I reported it, before anyone makes a snide comment, lol). I messaged the customer on Facebook, let's call him Chris. I told him what happened and sent him screenshots of the guy basically admitting that he did it. He responded and asked for more screenshots/ clarification. I responded.
He read my message and didn't respond. I got upset and messaged Chris a couple more times. I wasn't mean or anything but I did tell him to block me and said that I still have feelings for him. All he does is read them and he won't block me. I'm a bit confused. I get that he might want to stay out of it, but him reading the messages and not responding/ not blocking me doesn't make much sense to me.
This is a really bad situation and I should probably refrain from caring about what he thinks...
Last edited by seabreezeblue on Mon May 15, 2017 2:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: added trigger warning to title.. no further changes.
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Re: Is he trying to stay out of it? *may trigger*

Postby seabreezeblue » Mon May 15, 2017 3:09 pm

If he does have autism, then it's possible that he's unsure how to respond to you.. so he doesn't respond at all (possibly because he's anxious about saying the wrong thing and making you feel worse).

Did you ask him for his thoughts, or did you just send him the screen shots and clarify?

If you didn't ask for his thoughts, he's likely just taken the extra information without understanding that you'd like feedback on it.

If you care about him, and want him to keep talking to you, then try treating him as though he has autism, and state bluntly what you'd like from him.
Send him a text to apologise, and say that you were feeling upset that he hadn't replied to your message.. and that you'd really appreciate his support and thoughts on this.

If he doesn't respond to that, it's likely that he's just a jerk rather than autistic (or he's closed down from stress.. that can happen if someone on the spectrum is overwhelmed).

Do you mind outlining your interactions a bit for me please? What medication is he on?

Just as a side note.. some people with autism are actually just jerks.. and the autism is pretty irrelevant.. There are some people with autism that I'd happily be with, and some i wouldn't go anywhere near due to their personalities.
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and i'll run round the moon..

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