Our partner

What do I do now

Asperger's Syndrome message board, open discussion, and online support group.

What do I do now

Postby rawpop » Sat Apr 07, 2012 9:38 pm

I am 20 years old and I am more than sure I have Asperger's. I am undiagnosed, but that is only because basically my entire life is devoted to understanding how people do everything they do to make myself eventually capable of naturally being like them. I am so quiet all the time I barely talk to anyone, I feel like I am just observing everyone and everything around me. I have only recently become aware that I could have Aspergers and all the information I have found out has triggered so many memories that I'm almost obsessed with finding out more.
I just feel like I want people to know that this is the reason why nothing is expressed out of me the way they expect it to be, but at the same time I don't want to tell anyone. I don't know what to do now.
rawpop
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2012 9:33 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 9:32 am
Blog: View Blog (0)


ADVERTISEMENT

Re: What do I do now

Postby veramon240 » Sat Apr 07, 2012 11:03 pm

I'm generally in the same boat as you, i'm in the middle of being diagnosed but so far it's only suspect. It's really frustrating when you want to tell people how you feel but you can't find the words or you might not even have others to talk to due to the way you act socially. I'm forever reading people trying to get how they precisely work, but i wouldn't frustrate yourself with trying to learn to be like others if your brain is built similar to mine it's a lost cause :P

You came on here, made an account and posted this thread, i think that's a good start with trying to express how you feel. I generally think you should seek getting fully diagnosed so you get a clearer picture of how to deal with all this :/.

In the mean time i'm here bro :3
veramon240
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2012 10:53 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 2:32 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: What do I do now

Postby positivelyportrayed » Sun Apr 08, 2012 2:53 pm

I have only recently become aware that I could have Aspergers and all the information I have found out has triggered so many memories that I'm almost obsessed with finding out more.


I am relatively recently diagnosed and can identify with what you are feeling at the moment. If it is any consolation, I think it is a fairly frequent occurrence for people in your situation to feel as you do. For me it was like a snowball effect, starting with curiosity and than a rush of awareness and over-powering curiosity. And yes, it triggered a lot of memories for me too, many of which were very uncomfortable. I admit that I could think of nothing else ...

but at the same time I don't want to tell anyone. I don't know what to do now.


I understand this too! It depends on how "official" you want any diagnosis to be. Some are happy to self-diagnose and live with their own understanding, while others want to go through the diagnosic process (as I did). My rationale was that I had to know one way or the other - I was not certain it was AS.

You will need to make your own decision on this, but like veramon240 says, keep posting here, as this is a friendly, knowledgeable and helpful place to post.
positivelyportrayed
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 246
Joined: Sat Dec 24, 2011 11:04 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 10:32 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: What do I do now

Postby slugger » Tue Apr 10, 2012 7:47 pm

Hi rawpop, I am also new on the scene and so far I'm self-diagnosed but I plan on persuing a professional diagnosis soon. I'm 43 so I'm finding out later than you are!

The one thing I wanted to mention, as far as telling people, just remember, once you TELL someone you can never UNtell them! So take your time, and more time, and read up a lot, before you decide who and when to tell. For right now, I am only telling the "need-to-know" people in my life (i.e. my husband, and my best friend whom I totally trust). I am going to tell my brother soon only because I suspect he has autism himself so it would useful information to him. Others can wait. I can always tell the world later, but once it's done you can't take it back.

What else do you do now? Learn. Read. Mull it over. Give yourself time to absorb it all and accept that it's just "part of you", then you will be able to think it through clearly and you'll know how you want to deal with it.
Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on it's ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid. ~Albert Einstein

It is better to have a heart without words than words without a heart. ~Ghandi
slugger
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1166
Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2012 5:08 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 6:32 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: What do I do now

Postby CaseN » Wed Apr 11, 2012 8:51 am

rawpop wrote:...I just feel like I want people to know that this is the reason why nothing is expressed out of me the way they expect it to be, but at the same time I don't want to tell anyone. I don't know what to do now.

Hello rawpop,
I must agree with slugger. Please wait.
The reason why you want to tell everyone is that you may think they will understand that and it will be kind of excuse also for yourself. And you may think it will improve or solve something. That is not true at least according my opinion.
You do not have to tell the reason why you might not reach expectations of other people. Their expectations are their bussines. There is difference in yours and their thinking, you can understand that and that is positive for now...
CaseN
Consumer 1
Consumer 1
 
Posts: 33
Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:37 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 2:32 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: What do I do now

Postby slugger » Wed Apr 11, 2012 4:42 pm

CaseN wrote:
rawpop wrote:...I just feel like I want people to know that this is the reason why nothing is expressed out of me the way they expect it to be, but at the same time I don't want to tell anyone. I don't know what to do now.

Hello rawpop,
I must agree with slugger. Please wait.
The reason why you want to tell everyone is that you may think they will understand that and it will be kind of excuse also for yourself. And you may think it will improve or solve something. That is not true at least according my opinion.
You do not have to tell the reason why you might not reach expectations of other people. Their expectations are their bussines. There is difference in yours and their thinking, you can understand that and that is positive for now...


Very well said, CaseN, thanks for spelling that out so well, that was also a big part of my thinking that I couldn't quite put into words at the moment! :D
Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on it's ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid. ~Albert Einstein

It is better to have a heart without words than words without a heart. ~Ghandi
slugger
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1166
Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2012 5:08 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 6:32 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: What do I do now

Postby Sh3ld0n » Mon Apr 16, 2012 5:29 am

rawpop wrote: I don't know what to do now.


If you can get a professional verification, I suggest you do.
Learning about autism is extremely helpful in understanding yourself and others.
Living a life in confusion is not really an option, is it?
**********************
The implied qualifier is probably "tendency" if not otherwise stated...
I don't generalise in the classic sense...
My default MO is to think in terms of probabilities/improbabilities...
User avatar
Sh3ld0n
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 921
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2012 10:44 am
Local time: Wed Dec 02, 2020 12:32 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: What do I do now

Postby rawpop » Tue Mar 19, 2019 5:28 pm

Thank you everyone for your support. I'm sorry i disappeared after that I had too much anxiety to even come back rethinking over and over what i said. I am now 26 and just recently 2 months ago went to a doctor and have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, depression, and severe anxiety, i was too afraid to even go to a doctor until it was so bad i wasn't eating anything for days and thought i was going to die. I didn't bring up my thoughts of having aspergers yet because i wanted to hear what the psychiatrist thought. He asked me some questions that hinted to aspergers but some i didn't think about enough to answer correctly because i could not think straight from the anxiety. also because my mom was with me and i think she would not want to hear if i am on the autism spectrum. i am now on a combination of mood stabilizers, antidepressant, and a benzo which is starting to help a lot, mostly with the depression and anxiety so far. I should be starting therapy soon, and i'm going to bring up my original belief as i still do believe that is part of me. I will be alone for the therapy and hopefully i will feel comfortable enough to explain correctly how i feel.
rawpop
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2012 9:33 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 9:32 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: What do I do now

Postby shock_the_monkey » Tue Mar 19, 2019 9:52 pm

this is 7 years on. most, if not all, of the replying posters in this thread are long gone.

i think for the purpose of diagnosis it's important not only to mention your concerns about AS but also to specifically insist on see someone who specialises in it. a lot of medical professionals do not have the necessary expertise to make such a diagnosis. it's important to get the diagnosis correct in order for the treatment to be correct.

also, you can't be diagnosed with bi-polar (manic depression) AND depression, for obvious reasons. you either have one or the other. so, that rings some alarm bells, assuming that you've listed your diagnosis correctly.
something knocked me out' the trees
now i'm on my knees
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

there is one thing you must be sure of
i can't take any more
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

don't like it but i guess i'm learning

... shock the monkey to life
shock_the_monkey
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 4974
Joined: Tue Jan 15, 2008 10:36 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 3:32 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: What do I do now

Postby rawpop » Tue Mar 19, 2019 11:22 pm

shock_the_monkey wrote:this is 7 years on. most, if not all, of the replying posters in this thread are long gone.

i think for the purpose of diagnosis it's important not only to mention your concerns about AS but also to specifically insist on see someone who specialises in it. a lot of medical professionals do not have the necessary expertise to make such a diagnosis. it's important to get the diagnosis correct in order for the treatment to be correct.

also, you can't be diagnosed with bi-polar (manic depression) AND depression, for obvious reasons. you either have one or the other. so, that rings some alarm bells, assuming that you've listed your diagnosis correctly.


thank you for that information i will mention that on my next visit.
i was also mistaken i am being treated for bipolar 2 which is more severe depressive episodes, the way my psychiatrist was saying things threw me off about that.
rawpop
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2012 9:33 pm
Local time: Tue Dec 01, 2020 9:32 am
Blog: View Blog (0)


Return to Asperger's Syndrome Forum

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests