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Zero Friends

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Zero Friends

Postby unoon » Fri Jul 12, 2019 4:11 pm

I’m 25 and having a hard time caring enough to make friends. I went back to therapy at the beginning of the year and tried numerous times to make some connection, but I still don’t intuitively understand the appeal. This led to an ASD diagnosis but at first I was really afraid I might be Schizoid – so much so I posted on the Schizoid forum. I felt lost until my psych recently gave me some great advice. He said I have a choice: either learn to cope with dumb people or put in the necessary effort to hang out with smart people; otherwise I run out of $#%^ to talk about quickly. So, I wanted to ask, do you still have any difficulty with maintaining a social circle and what have you learned about being aspi and still having friends? Thanks for your help.
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Re: Zero Friends

Postby shock_the_monkey » Mon Jan 20, 2020 5:58 am

the only form of interest is self-interest. therefore, if you have no interest in other people or they have no interest in you, there isn't going to be any friendship. even altruism works this way. there is always a payoff for the altruist, no matter how deeply it is hidden. in short, find people interesting or forget having them as friends. and, i have to say, this is not the same as finding interesting people. the fact that you want to talk rather than listen says it all to me. you have to be prepared to do both. friendships are about give and take.
something knocked me out' the trees
now i'm on my knees
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

there is one thing you must be sure of
i can't take any more
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

don't like it but i guess i'm learning

... shock the monkey to life
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