Lupus diagnosis

It states on the web that 40% of folks will die within the first four years after diagnosis. I just got diagnosed,yet I've known something is wrong with me for the last few months or more. So, the weird thing is that I'm not overreacting or freakn out because it would be a release of mental anguish to die and in my belief system, be with an all-loving, noncomparable to any freakn parent out there that... yep... you have no clue what they're up tonight. Disfunctional family patterns get even MORE prevelant especially with over one person being mental health problems are in the finially....
Anyways... just know I truly cannot go on in this subject marred, just was diagnosed with lupus.f it. At least if I'm having none or less... mental anguish, mental despair, being made fun of me for my failures within the PCP/Apple codes, and maybe I could do not cuz my therapist warned so not to do so due to explicitness, sexual things. She's trying to refer me to a dbt group, yet I don't have a car and my mom would brick a $#%^ off, and since her ass is so small, break it in half.
Tty for now, get ahold of me and peace dudes.