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guilt vs paranoia

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guilt vs paranoia

Postby saucygirl31 » Sat Aug 31, 2019 1:05 am

my t says she isn't gunna pretend that I feel guilt or remorse any more, but I think I do.

but idk if it's paranoia.

basically my thought process is I feel bad after I do bad because I feel like someone might retaliate. bcuz I know I would probly retaliate.

i don't loose sleep over it but it does keep me vigilant.

anyone can relate?
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby morbid3 » Sat Aug 31, 2019 3:52 am

Long-time lurker here. I often read this forum because of the interesting questions that come up here. Like this one.

Feelings like guilt happen regardless of expected consequences. Fear of retaliation would be slightly different, and "normal" people would probably denounce you for thinking that the two things might be the same. They might think something like this: the ability to feel guilt makes you a moral being, while being unable to feel it means you are not a moral being and thus cannot be a normal member of society. Or even that you cannot be a "good person".

I believe there is an academic school of thought though that sees feelings of guilt as something we've acquired via evolution to prevent us from even risking retaliation. By knowing that we'll definitely experience such feelings, even if there is no detection or retaliation, we stay away from such behaviors in the first place. Which is (supposedly) good for us, and good for the group we're a member of, whether that's family, tribe or even the human species. And also, such feelings may compel us to atone for the wrong we have done later, even if undetected. Which again is (supposedly) good for the species' survival.

Have you ever felt that you wanted to take back that bad thing you've done, in a situation where nobody figured it was you who'd done it and thus you were sure there wouldn't be any retaliation? If yes, then perhaps you have in fact experienced guilt.
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby Squaredonutwheels » Sat Aug 31, 2019 6:49 am

Everyone's "bad" is different in secret, despite people presenting themselves under one truth one morals.

If you listen and watch carefully, there are plenty of "bad" things you can do that you can do without repercussion because they want it.

If you're having to watch your back too much, it probably means that you enjoy pissing people off more than what ever it is that you're trying to get. Which I am certain is fun in it's own way?

Paranoia is something people develop to fill a need.
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby justonemoreperson » Sat Aug 31, 2019 7:00 am

@OP

Sometimes I look back at stuff i did the night before etc and I then realise how bad it could have gone and the possible consequences of the behaviour and I think, "What a twat."

I'm not concerned that someone may retaliate, but it does make me realise that I'm not as 'in control' of myself as I sometimes like to believe and it's frustrating.
I'm not arguing; I'm explaining why I'm right.
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby ZeroZ » Sat Aug 31, 2019 8:29 am

Well the paranoia would have to come from an acceptance that you did something wrong I would think? So maybe you are experiencing it in a different way than typical “healthy” people would is it some kind of guilt? Also, substance use issues essentially change your personality, I was a completely different person when I was using and I didn’t touch anything as hard as you have.

If you could get clean, get into a stable environment, even things as mundane as eating and sleeping normally again can have an effect on things like paranoia, anxiety etc.

As far as how I feel about things personally, I’m paranoid of people without doing anything, so I won’t do something if it’s wrong in my mind, if I do something I think the person deserves it regardless how others see it and I won’t spend time thinking about it.
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby solemnlysworn » Sat Aug 31, 2019 9:28 am

I find it quite reasonable that, after committing a deed that has harmed another, you might find yourself more vigilant of repercussion or suspicious of vengeful retaliation. Regret for having acted untoward is even a reasonable aftertaste if you hadn't considered the weight of potential consequences fully beforehand. Extending it further again, even wishing for forgiveness seems to stay fairly consistent with lack of guilt, in self-preservation.

If the reason that you feel the way you do is purely based on what might happen to you afterwards, it isn't guilt, surely. It's fear of consequence. You're delaying the worry or anxiety of the impact of your actions. Given what you've said, there's no reason to also add guilt into the equation.
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby Oblivion » Sat Aug 31, 2019 12:24 pm

Guilt is one part empathy, one part fear of reprisal or punishment, and one part social conditioning.

Unless you're religious. Then, all bets are off. You can do anything you want, then confess/repent, wash, rinse, repeat.
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby justonemoreperson » Sat Aug 31, 2019 1:34 pm

Religion doesn't absolve guilt; it conditions it.

Religion allows people to hate, reject, control, marginalise and judge with a clean conscience while creating other "sins" to focus the guilt and create a tribe mentality.
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby creative_nothing » Sat Aug 31, 2019 4:09 pm

It does not make Sense comparing guilty to paranoia.
What does make Sense is to compare guilty to shame and guilty based societies to Shame base societies.

Everyone is selfish in a philosophical Sense. Even the most compassionate saint is acting accourding to his own Will( his own intolerance to other's people pain)

I guess what distinguish antisocial and prosocial people are things like How shameful and How stingy you are.
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In the animal kingdom, the rule is, eat or be eaten; in the human kingdom, define or be defined
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Re: guilt vs paranoia

Postby saucygirl31 » Sat Aug 31, 2019 5:26 pm

morbid3 wrote:Have you ever felt that you wanted to take back that bad thing you've done, in a situation where nobody figured it was you who'd done it and thus you were sure there wouldn't be any retaliation?


idk i tend to think ppl deserve it or blame them for making me act out. sometimes i merely think it's funny and enjoy the reaction - not so much concerned about the reaction actually more like sadistic and hoping there is a negative reaction.

if no one was looking or knew, id surely be a lot more fukery.

my t asked if I'd ever take a bullet so to speak for someone else, I said I'd only do it for example for someoner I love if it were making u go bald cuz I know id look better bald than her. in other words if I could handle it a lot better. but if it were breaking a leg id have her legs broken over mine hands down.like I'd feel bad about it lol but not enough to change my mind.
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