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Using a diagnosis as a crutch

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Re: Using a diagnosis as a crutch

Postby SoloZombie » Wed Feb 13, 2019 10:18 am

^ Just to add to that, treating a PD is more than recognizing bad behavior and eliminating it, it’s also about replacing them with more successful behaviors or like JOMP says you get frustrated and think it can’t work.

I’ve never met anyone in real life with disordered traits that liked the consequences of it, the borderline who falls in love over and over again only to end up destroying each one because they are afraid to be abandoned, the anti social who is in and out of prison, the avoidant who can’t go to the events they would like to go too. The problem is they don’t recognize their part in it and blame, society, bad luck, the government you name it. If you talk someone they are anti social and they say well I really can’t help my #######5 behavior I have a mental illness, that’s where a diagnosis is crutch, it’s a convenient excuse. Just like ‘society ‘ or the ‘government ‘ it means they don’t have to face the fact they are responsible for their behavior.
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Re: Using a diagnosis as a crutch

Postby justonemoreperson » Wed Feb 13, 2019 1:14 pm

SoloZombie wrote:It’s a convenient excuse. Just like ‘society ‘ or the ‘government ‘ it means they don’t have to face the fact they are responsible for their behavior.

To be pedantic, it's a valid excuse; it's just that to use it as an excuse is, as you say, a failure to be responsible for their behaviour.

The problem is that the word "responsible" tends to form an image in people's minds of conforming or giving up to someone else's rules. "I need to pay the electric bill because they're sending me nasty letters and making me. So, I'll resist."

Whereas, the real meaning of 'responsible', in this case, means the opposite; that you're not succumbing to the drivings of a mental failure, but you're making a positive choice to take control over your life. "I choose to pay the electric bill, because it's going to save me the extra money in fees and reconnection if I don't."
I'm not arguing; I'm explaining why I'm right.
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Re: Using a diagnosis as a crutch

Postby Jonna » Wed Feb 13, 2019 6:58 pm

SoloZombie wrote:I’ve seen it here and other places on the Internet people identify with their disorder or diagnosis to an extent to justify poor behavior. I’m not talking about being unaware or shifting blame unknowingly, I’m talking about being very aware of the behavior and accepting it as inevitable because you have an illness.

Is this an example of how a diagnosis can be a negative influence, an amplifier for someone, such as they can now explain such bizarre behavior because there is a disorder to blame it on now? I’m a firm believer that if you can identify and are aware of something you can try and work it out. We are not physically handicapped, well maybe a few of you are and a few more probably need to wear hockey helmets when you go outside but that’s for a different discussion.

Has being diagnosed helped you to correct unwanted behavior or has it become a crutch for you to justify it?

No to both. I don't ever behave in ways that I don't want. Every choice I make is cold and calculated. I was more violent in the past. Even then, I was choosing to be...sometimes it was just out of curiosity about how a person would react; other times goal-oriented and occasionally self-entertainment but always calm and pre-meditated. However, I was being arrested repeatedly for these crimes of violence. So, over time being able to outwit the system started to factor more into my calculations. Thus, it's been a tradeoff....as my use or indulgence in violence decreased over time, the deceitfulness factors increased.
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Re: Using a diagnosis as a crutch

Postby easiersaidthandone » Wed Feb 13, 2019 9:00 pm

You are putting your definition of suffering unto others. Some people might not suffer from what you see as suffering. The other 3 cluster b's suffer massively from their dysfunctions. Again, you need to really stop projecting.

In my experience, the people who suffer are those around me, not me. As I am fine with my behavior, and embrace it. And whatever consequences I must face then I will.

And I don't excuse my behavior. Because I don't need to. Do you think it bothers me to commit "antisocial" acts that I have to excuse and shift blame? It doesn't.
I don't fake it. I just make it.
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Re: Using a diagnosis as a crutch

Postby Manners73 » Wed Feb 13, 2019 9:23 pm

This is how I know that my antisocial behaviour is from what I learnt when I was growing up.

I got to a certain age and knew I had to change. It was/is hard but it is all about getting used to different habits.

My brother who did have aspd on the other hand was more than happy with his lifestyle. I can remember having conversations with him on prison visits and he used to tell me that he'll never change, he'll never move away to a different area and he'll never ever stop doing what he was doing.

I think that might be hard for people without PD to understand but I get it now.

If he had changed, if he had stopped it all then he might still be alive but he wouldn't be happy and he would just be living a lie.

Saying that though I think I'm happier when I'm being antisocial too.
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