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Emotional behavior in others.

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Emotional behavior in others.

Postby Solowolfpack » Thu Jan 17, 2019 11:52 am

How do you view other people’s responses to slightly stressful situations? Do you see an emotional component as being necessary to deal with the situation at hand, or do you view it as a hinderance to a simpler solution.

An example of what I’m getting at would be someone is late for work, they’ve been warned and they will get written up if they are late again. They get anxious and go into a panic, rush to work cutting in and out of traffic to attempt to get there on time. Does this have its benefits or would a cooler head always prevail?
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby justonemoreperson » Thu Jan 17, 2019 12:06 pm

I have a feeling you're looking at this back to front, but I might be wrong.

Everyone has an emotional reaction to everything that happens. If we care more the reaction is bigger but it's there nevertheless.

The difference is that some people have a reactive nature to that trigger and, if that's extreme enough, it leads to a disorder, whereas others will have the reaction and then back off and examine it to see how critical it is and what the risks are.

Typically, with AsPD that process is short-circuited and you don't give a f*ck about consequences, you just react to the trigger. We keep talking about psychopaths and people with AsPD not having emotions, but in fact the opposite is true. They have a much more emotional reaction to things but it's not seen that way, as it doesn't have a bearing on anyone else. Therefore, I care about me and not about anyone else.

So, the trigger would be "I'm late." At one extreme you don't give a f*ck and stay in bed. The next stage is that you do care, because you don't want to lose your job, so you drive like a f*ckwit to get there, because you care about yourself but not about those you're knocking into the bushes.

The final stage is that you think, "I'm late. I need to rush but I can't do that at the expense of others, as it's my fault I'm late, and I'll need to accept responsibility for that when I get there and apologise to my manager."

The last one is the cool head; it's the most positive one for you, as it will get the best outcome for you, but it requires the most amount of demonstrated care.

So, to be truly selfish, you must care about others. At least by outward appearance.
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby Greebo » Thu Jan 17, 2019 1:02 pm

It’s a false dichotomy.

Emotion is necessary to drive/motivate behaviour while calculation is necessary for meaningful and efficient application of that drive.
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby vcrpamphlet » Thu Jan 17, 2019 8:09 pm

justonemoreperson wrote:So, to be truly selfish, you must care about others.


Unto itself, that might be the most insightful thing ever said about this place.
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby salles » Thu Jan 17, 2019 10:37 pm

vcrpamphlet wrote:
justonemoreperson wrote:So, to be truly selfish, you must care about others.


Unto itself, that might be the most insightful thing ever said about this place.


It's not that insightful.
He is saying one has to pretend to give a s'hit about rules,regulations,people in authority, in order to hold down a job that one may need. It's stupid not to, ( whether or not you agree with such rule), if it benefits you to tow the line.
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby vcrpamphlet » Thu Jan 17, 2019 11:05 pm

Na, it is, just not so much in context with the post.

On its own, in context with ASPD it can be stated differently as: Having a pro-social outlook maximises net personal gain.
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby Ravenous » Fri Jan 18, 2019 7:16 am

Honestly, I find that most people overreact to stressful situations which makes whatever they are doing more unmanageable.

If a situation is stressful, it's not useful to stress about it at that moment or any moment. Being late for work, for example, is one of those things that people ruin their entire day over. In my mind it's useless to stress if there is nothing you can do about it. Call who you report to, tell them when you expect to be at work and make a plan to get there and to not let it happen again and move on. Shouting at people in traffic and stressing is only going to make things worse and give you a headache. Chill.
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby justonemoreperson » Fri Jan 18, 2019 7:42 am

Ravenous wrote:Honestly, I find that most people overreact to stressful situations which makes whatever they are doing more unmanageable.

If a situation is stressful, it's not useful to stress about it at that moment or any moment. Being late for work, for example, is one of those things that people ruin their entire day over. In my mind it's useless to stress if there is nothing you can do about it. Call who you report to, tell them when you expect to be at work and make a plan to get there and to not let it happen again and move on. Shouting at people in traffic and stressing is only going to make things worse and give you a headache. Chill.


I'm pretty sure that everyone reading that will have already heard it and will have recited it at some point. The problem is, that mentality only really works when you're replying to a post on an internet forum.

I don't know a single person, including myself, who's never reacted emotionally to an event and felt that they were always able to control their response.

I'm going to take a guess that you're no different.
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby salles » Fri Jan 18, 2019 7:58 am

Solowolfpack wrote:How do you view other people’s responses to slightly stressful situations? Do you see an emotional component as being necessary to deal with the situation at hand, or do you view it as a hinderance to a simpler solution.

An example of what I’m getting at would be someone is late for work, they’ve been warned and they will get written up if they are late again. They get anxious and go into a panic, rush to work cutting in and out of traffic to attempt to get there on time. Does this have its benefits or would a cooler head always prevail?


I cannot think of many situations where an emotional response to a stressful situation ( that is work reelated)is beneficial. Except in extraordinary situations where the motivation behind the response is genuine Love of another, rather than self interest. eg. if a situation triggers strength.courage and fearlessness to save the life of another...etc..
- Jomp -Typically, with AsPD that process is short-circuited and you don't give a f*ck about consequences, you just react to the trigger. We keep talking about psychopaths and people with AsPD not having emotions, but in fact the opposite is true. They have a much more emotional reaction to things but it's not seen that way, as it doesn't have a bearing on anyone else. Therefore, I care about me and not about anyone else

I agree that those with aspd have strong emotions; anger, reaction to humiliation etc. Their emotions tend to be on behalf of themselves rather than an empathetic response to the plight of another.

Is being emotional ( in general ) beneficial?
Sure. Most people would opt for a disposition that enables one to experience certain elation along with lows, as long as it is not on the 'disordered' spectrum. Great music, art, literature would not be so amazing if we all had a schizoid or aspd type personality.

In general women tend to be more emotional than men. For this reason they continuously fail at attaining or holding positions of power in a corporate world or any career dominated by men. Is this a bad thing? Not sure...
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Re: Emotional behavior in others.

Postby Ravenous » Fri Jan 18, 2019 8:11 am

There are things that I react to and those are things that actually threaten my life or freedom. Things like being late for work are trivial in comparison to actual stress that I have had to face in my life time.

It's probably a bit callous because your emotional reaction is based on your experience and others may not have had extremes but I still get damn irritated with people who react that way.

I had a recent event where I overreacted because I was threatened with blackmail and violence by two people who had the means to accomplish both. Luckily, so far, nothing has happened but it ruined what could have been a lovely day so I won't let that happen again.
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