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Personal responsibility

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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby ZombieZ » Wed Jul 11, 2018 9:32 pm

It’s easy to blame everyone for your problems, it’s tough to face the truth but sooner or later you have to look in the mirror and be honest with yourself or you will be doomed to same destructive patterns.
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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby Fool » Wed Jul 11, 2018 9:36 pm

madness00 wrote:I shift blame.

It's hard to quantify.

When you don't even take responsibility for simple things such as food and bills, it's hard to look at it under an even larger scope.

I mean, i payed may dues so to speak with the courts. I suffered almost all possible consequences (except jail). And there's no one to blame other than myself.

Then where does blame shifting come in?
Other than blaming my family for not raising me in the ideal way (which i assume is true for most everyone), the little things. Things like why i'm alone, etc.


why does your family matter? what is ideal and why do you care about it enough to lie to yourself?

holy shmocks i'm all questions questions questions

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMYuTsNW9pQ
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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby madness00 » Wed Jul 11, 2018 9:40 pm

I just think if my father wasn't packed of hot and cold anger i wouldn't have developed as many antisocial traits. I blame my father for any narcissism i picked up along the way, too, because he is much more narcissistic than i am. I am both the golden child and the black sheep, if you can imagine.

So as to your next question, why lie to myself? I will say they did a fine job. Could have been worse. Just, could have been better. That's all.
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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby chaman » Wed Jul 11, 2018 9:51 pm

dobiedobiedoo wrote:Personal responsibility means admitting ownership for your own behavior (at least to yourself) and the consequences of that behavior, actions or failures.
Do you do that sort of thing or is your natural instinct to blame shift?
A feeling of obligation is something that can drive a sense of responsibility for many people. What drives yours?


I do have the criteria to know when i have the blame or when not. Although, i dont actually care about that and wouldn´t also admit it publicly if it didn´t benefit me.
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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby Fool » Wed Jul 11, 2018 9:56 pm

madness00 wrote:I just think if my father wasn't packed of hot and cold anger i wouldn't have developed as many antisocial traits. I blame my father for any narcissism i picked up along the way, too, because he is much more narcissistic than i am. I am both the golden child and the black sheep, if you can imagine.

So as to your next question, why lie to myself? I will say they did a fine job. Could have been worse. Just also, could have been better. That's all.



"picked up along the way" is kinda funny. how is it his fault? if he is a narcissist, did he pick it up from someone? if so, is it not their fault? if not so, why are you different from him? based on what you say...is it not simpler to imagine the only difference between you and your father, is that he has experienced fatherhood?

why does putting your troubles on him make your life easier? do you think you would suffer more, or less, if he had been "a better man"??

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSbBvKaM6sk
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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby madness00 » Wed Jul 11, 2018 10:04 pm

It doesn't make life any easier to live, blaming him, what it does is puts things into perspective so that i can better analyze where things went wrong. And if a primary caregiver isn't the correct spot to look, i'm not sure where is.

If he'd been a better man, i would undoubtedly suffer less.

If you met him you'd never have a reason other to not like him other than his overt narcissism. Again, it really wasn't that bad, just not ideal.
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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby Fool » Wed Jul 11, 2018 10:19 pm

madness00 wrote:It doesn't make life any easier to live, blaming him, what it does is puts things into perspective so that i can better analyze where things went wrong. And if a primary caregiver isn't the correct spot to look, i'm not sure where is.


the mirror, perhaps?




If you met him you'd never have a reason other to not like him other than his overt narcissism. Again, it really wasn't that bad, just not ideal.


again i ask, what is ideal?



if he'd been a better man, i would undoubtedly suffer less.


though you wouldn't be here, and we wouldn't have the pleasure of your company=)

would that be so bad?



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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby madness00 » Wed Jul 11, 2018 10:27 pm

Like i said, i have suffered enough from my crimes and i've paid my dues. If i were a psychopath, i wouldn't need to blame my environment, but i'm not.

"Ideal" would be allowing me to be emotionally expressive without getting mad at me for it, for a start. Everything else i don't blame him for, because he is genuinely a slave of his narcissism.

I, however, am not. I am more of a slave to my antisocial traits and bipolar disorder. My narcissism gets in the way, but not anything like how it effects him. I am much more self aware.
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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby Fool » Wed Jul 11, 2018 10:41 pm

madness00 wrote:Like i said, i have suffered enough


by who's standard?


If i were a psychopath, i wouldn't need to blame my environment, but i'm not.


so you're saying one needs to be morally insane in order to admit responsibility for their life?

ha, i like it

"Ideal" would be allowing me to be emotionally expressive without getting mad at me for it, for a start. Everything else i don't blame him for, because he is genuinely a slave of his narcissism.


you are quite expressive, no? you can sympathize with the old man, and appreciate your own repression at the same time

I, however, am not. I am more of a slave to my antisocial traits and bipolar disorder. My narcissism gets in the way, but not anything like how it effects him. I am much more self aware.


do you think he lies to himself? if so, about what?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8OipmKFDeM
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Re: Personal responsibility

Postby madness00 » Wed Jul 11, 2018 10:54 pm

Well, not by the DA's standards (that bitch) but by my own. I have suffered quite a bit for a college grad who grew up in upper-middle class suburbia. Let's say, compared to my past friends.

You don't need to be morally insane, but it doesn't leave you with many outs.

I don't know, am i expressive? Surely more so than a non-Bipolar.
I guess i can see what he means about emotions being bullsh!t, as does Bill Burr, but i can't appreciate being a helpless child and learning to repress anger. For example. That's the one that hurt the most. Every time i got angry, whether or not for good reason, he how tower over my aggression and get mad that i got mad. It makes me angry even writing this. Repressing anger is like.. a recipe for disaster.. Fool.

I'm sure he has lied to himself, yes. Don't we all.
He came from nothing and made a great life for himself, so he does have a substantiated right to be who he acts like. But he treats people like objects with no emotions. So i think if he were to lie to himself, he would be lying in thinking that his "objects" need him more than they really do. He thinks he is a man of great influence.
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