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Rage issues

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Rage issues

Postby TrustNoFishball » Mon May 14, 2018 4:41 pm

Hi guys, I need help for a friend(not only a friend honestly)
He's sociopath and I accept this, I want to help him
But I can't understand his rage with me, he never act so angry with the other girls he's been with
The only way to fight him is using the same violence but I can't do that anymore, I don't want to
Can someone explain why all this anger?

ps I'm from Italy sorry for the english lol
pps I have BPD
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Re: Rage issues

Postby Reaper » Wed May 16, 2018 12:52 pm

TrustNoFishball wrote:Hi guys, I need help for a friend(not only a friend honestly)
He's sociopath and I accept this, I want to help him
But I can't understand his rage with me, he never act so angry with the other girls he's been with
The only way to fight him is using the same violence but I can't do that anymore, I don't want to
Can someone explain why all this anger?


It's your BPD. It's setting him off.

Having BPD your emotions are likely unstable. The whole hot and cold thing is probably frustrating him and he doesn't know any other way to deal with it other than through anger and violence.
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Re: Rage issues

Postby Siegfried » Wed May 16, 2018 2:51 pm

Help for a friend eh? Alrighty there fishball.
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Re: Rage issues

Postby julllia » Wed May 16, 2018 3:00 pm

When i had a crush with a borderline he pushed my buttons and instead of acting rational and calm i pushed his.
Like noone were mature emotionally to deal
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Re: Rage issues

Postby KvotheTheRaven » Wed May 16, 2018 5:42 pm

I've had a few relationships with BPDs. They were good as long as I got what I wanted. They were cut off when I didn't.
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Re: Rage issues

Postby julllia » Wed May 16, 2018 6:00 pm

^nons or everyone doesn't do that too? They are only with someone as long as they get what they want.
Why else would you be with someone?
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Re: Rage issues

Postby Siegfried » Wed May 16, 2018 6:06 pm

I think Raven means a relationship without the incentive of staying. If you want someone to stay with you, you usually have to sacrifice parts of yourself. It's a balance really, you want the person you're with to perceive that they're getting as much as they're giving.
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Re: Rage issues

Postby julllia » Wed May 16, 2018 6:15 pm

Oh ok!i guess you can say everyone wants different things also
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Re: Rage issues

Postby Quoth » Wed May 16, 2018 6:36 pm

You’re with someone for the purposes of being with them aren’t you? Companionship and whatnot.
To enjoy doing things with them just for the sake of doing things with them. if life’s highs are not are not invigorated and low’s not softened because you did it with them, I’m not sure I really see the point. True for both friendships and romantic relationships.

Probably partly why I struggle to comprehend the behaviour of those people who get in abusive relationships and don’t want to leave.

I can see how someone with a PD could take a more mercenary approach though.
”The man would then tear up little pieces of paper above the street, and the creatures, attracted by this shower of white butterflies, came out into the middle of the road, raising enquiring paws towards the last pieces of paper. At this the little old man would spit on the cats, firmly and accurately.”
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Re: Rage issues

Postby Reaper » Wed May 16, 2018 9:55 pm

julllia wrote:^nons or everyone doesn't do that too? They are only with someone as long as they get what they want.
Why else would you be with someone?


For most people the give and take in relationships is mutual and it comes from a place of genuine care (caring about each other, wanting to satisfy each other's needs). What raven is talking about is not mutual, at least I assume it's not.

If she views relationships the way I do, then she only cares about her own needs. Any give and take is purely about getting her own needs met, and if she's anything like me those needs aren't emotional, they're physical. There's no genuine care for the other person.
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