I get angry when I see straight men.

It frustrates me to live in this world and being surrounded by straight men. It’s a constant reminder of trauma they made me go through as a kid. I grew up in poverty and around very crazy people who hated gay dudes for no reason. Every straight man around me hated gay dudes and I was around that kind of environment for many, many years. It deeply traumatized because I was always alone and suffering in silence for many years.

I hate all straight men. Even the ones who don’t hate gay men. They always caused so many problems in my life. Always making me a target to start $#%^ up. I don’t like seeing them being friends with other gay men or being in gay bars or gay establishments. Every time I see one, it gets me angry. They’re all the same to me. They always bring shame and misery to gay men. I wish I could get away from those little bastards.

Welcome to the forum Crunch,

I am sorry to hear of the emotional time that you had growing up around straight men who weren't very accepting. Those events and traumas can really change your perspective as you grow up into adulthood. Unfortunately, you will have to deal with straight men on a daily basis and you don't have control over it. The only thing you have control over is yourself and your thoughts.

As you probably know, not as straight men are like the one you knew from your childhood and its not healthy to overgeneralize. It happens though, like in your case. It is perfectly fine if you don't want to befriend any straight men, but it matters if you continue to carry all this hate towards them. It will irritate you and causes you unnecessary stress.

I think the first step would be to think of any straight men that you are OK with and realize that not all of them are bad

I symphatize with your story.
I'm just bi (Find a lot of women attractive, then every now and then I meet a guy, and go WOW!)
I'm 43, and still haven't told my parents, too afraid of what these hard-*ss farmers will think.
I have some really macho friends, though, and figured out something in the last 20 years or so...
Thos straight guys you are so afraid of?
THEY are afraid.
They have been raised in a system where they could never show emotion, never show weakness, or be labeled as 'Gay'. My last boyfriend was Polish, and if his friends found out he was gay, they would have KILLED him.
It's really sad. There are a lot of men out there who are desperately longing for some kind of contact, for tenderness, but have been bullied into behaving like stereotypes.
Those are the most dangerous ones. I'm always anxious when trying to hook up with a man, because I fear he will not reject ME... He will reject all the feelings he has buried, don't know how to handle them, and respond with violence.
I wish I had more positive news. We've come along way, but the end is not in sight. My love to you, Johei.