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That 'angry b**ch'

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That 'angry b**ch'

Postby ForeverIndecesive » Sun Aug 25, 2019 12:00 am

Im kinda coming out of a depressive phase right now where I was constantly worrying and sad and ruminating. Im starting to feel more like myself. But this self im coming back to I recognize and know well..but always so angry. I used to treat anger like a friend and a companion to tell me to suck it up and to get going. Coming back to my normal self just makes me realize how strange it is. I have always felt this intense rage -they kind that makes you want to hit people with lunch trays. And i find the familiar thoughts of 'I hate everybody' in my head. I look at people how I used to before my depressive episode -and I think how much I hate them. Especially women? I feel like I want to break plates and drive off into nowhere. My sweet mother cant stand the mood changes anymore. Every little thing annoys me and irritates simple things like asking about how my class went. Im a person who thinks emotions are overrated but I never thought that about anger. Im even angry at happy things. I always feel like every thing is personal. People are trying to prove something to me and make me feel stupid. All the photos I look at, I look mad and upset. I dont know why this is? I cant work out my emotions. Its like a headphone cord you never took out of your back pocket because you knew how tangled it is. And so it sits there and gets even more tangled. I guess what im trying to say is I really want to listen to the music now and untangle the cord. But I dont even know where to begin. I dont know what Im feeling and whether somethings are fake and what is really important. Im getting tired of anger and general feelings of spite for people being my only emotions. I know this anger is really just covering something but I honest to god cant figure out what. I like being angry sometimes, I like how it makes me feel. I like how it makes other people feel. 'Dont ###$ with me' kinda vibes. But I know deep down it isnt right..any thoughts?
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Re: That 'angry b**ch'

Postby Aries411 » Sun Aug 25, 2019 3:38 pm

Hey Forever,

You seem confused where your anger is coming from and unlike other emotions, anger is created from many different feelings. Anger is very impulsive and you often react instead of responding to a situation. Have you had a change to look through the thread about Getting Rid of Anger and Reducing Stress?
To start unwinding that cord, I would start with something simple and recognize your triggers. Are there people or situations that trigger your anger? Second, maybe introduce some relaxing into your life where you can calm yourself down. On the opposite side, you can get rid of some of that energy through exercise. Finally, I would look into mindfulness or CBT to look at that anger and see that many of our thoughts regarding anger don't make much sense and that anger doesn't do us any good.
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Re: That 'angry b**ch'

Postby Johei » Thu Sep 03, 2020 12:46 am

Hey Forever,

I used to explode at the slightest thing. For years I raged on about all that was wrong with the world, and why everybody was too stupid to fix it.
What snapped me out of it, was letting go of my own feelings.
It is too late for me.
I cannot fix myself
But I AM the one who is messed up, not the world, not society.
I decided to stop focussing on things that annoyed me, and start helping others who needed help more than me.
If you have an outlet for the emotions raging inside you, embrace your tender side (Volunteer at a youth center, read stories to the dying in a hospital), you will get a new perspective.
There is nothing you can GET or TAKE to make it better. GIVE yourself, and you will get so much back.
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