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Tips to handle anger related issues

Open Discussions about Anger and Anger Management.

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Tips to handle anger related issues

Postby alishasharma » Sat Jun 22, 2019 6:26 am

Anger is a basic human emotion like many others such as sadness, happiness etc. Anger is experienced when some kind of danger, violation or injustice is perceived or felt by a person. Anger can be seen in different forms ranging from irritation to blinding rage or resentment.

Experiencing anger is normal, but if the frequency of anger episodes increases and it starts to affect person’s life, relationships, work, legal standing then it becomes a problem. In Adults, an uncontrollable emotion of rage often escalates to some serious incidents. Hence it is important to monitor the frequency and ways in which a person shows this emotion and how it affects their life.
There are number of symptoms that demonstrates the possibility of anger in an adult:

• You feel angry because of a small fight in your relationship
• Missing a promotion at work triggers anger
• Socially, you feel agitated and find difficulty in adjusting
• constant negative thinking and focusing on negative experiences
• Getting extremely angry while arguing over petty issues
• being physically violent when you’re angry
• threatening violence to people or their property
• an inability to control your anger
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Re: Tips to handle anger related issues

Postby Sarandipity » Tue Oct 15, 2019 7:04 pm

I came here for tips. I was awake till 3.30am and only slept because I sent a text about what I was angry about to the relavent people.

I got angry earlier in the day. Then I did a normal evening, ate dinner and watched TV and read some jokes to cheer me up. Then I got into bed and I was fuming angry. It didn't stop when I decided ways to deal with the issue. It only stopped when I actually did something (send a text).

I thought I'd done enough ignoring it and relaxing. I need other tips. Only certain things set me off this bad but it does happen occasionally and I need some tips on what to do. I feel it would have been better if I hadn't sent the text and had more time to think. I didn't say anything in the text and what I did say actually relieved the pressure because I said I won't be around the people who caused the anger for 2 weeks because I'm angry. But I feel like I could of dealt with it differently - the actual anger, not the people. It was better to say it and to give myself those couple of weeks to calm down but I could of done without the loosing sleep and also I ache all over now because the rage was so immense my whole body was tense, when I realized I was in bed with clenched fists that's when I thought send a text, say what's needed to say and I did go to sleep. Usually I sleep easily but this anger or rage was overwhelming.
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Re: Tips to handle anger related issues

Postby NewSunRising » Wed Oct 16, 2019 7:03 am

Would it help to write your anger out in our venting forum or a blog ? Perhaps letting it all loose in a safe environment and waiting even an hour or two could help . Even if you're still angry , re-reading your first draft may help you to still express your anger to those who you want or need to , but maybe less impulsively and with fewer regrets about things said in the heat of the moment .

Others on this forum have found exercise helpful . Not just a few sit-ups or a walk around the block but something that really leaves you tired . Not always practical in the moment but it might be worth a try .
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Re: Tips to handle anger related issues

Postby Sarandipity » Wed Oct 16, 2019 8:26 am

Thanks NewSunRising. I'm not a saying things in the heat of the moment person. In the moment I sat very calmly imaging a variety ways to physically hurt them. When I left I calmed down and when I got home I decided how to deal with it I plan everything. I planned to go back there sarcastically wearing a list of how ignorant they were and do a presentation on it and had a long term plan to deal with them.

I thought I was "ok" about it and had a normal evening. The problem came, I think because having different parts of myself. I got into bed and it was kind of anxiety thoughts "could do this instead or that" which then made me again personally incredibly angry and the violent thoughts started again. At half three I thought f this. I sent a text saying I'm incredibly angry, maybe see you in two weeks when I've calmed down. There's no regret on the text because it stopped the "could do this or that" stuff and I went to sleep.

For me it's annoying that I can't go and sarcastically call them up on their ignorance but that's more of a me problem than a them problem. It's because of the anxiety parts in me trying to avoid a confrontation thinking time will make it better - but it won't. I'm still angry, it simmers and it won't go away because every time I look at that person it's gonna be there, it's there now just thinking about her. I guess I could try venting that out. I'll try it. Thanks.
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Re: Tips to handle anger related issues

Postby NewSunRising » Sun Oct 20, 2019 12:30 am

It sounds very draining to experience that anger and I'm glad that you had the restraint to stop writing when you did . Unfortunately , the world is fraught with ignorance and it is extremely difficult to see or hear it without being personally affected .

I think the most frustrating part is that there is no getting some people to understand how bad they're making themselves look . We all want to believe that our views and opinions are justified and we're entitled to speak them . Freedom of speech , you know ? No matter how ignorant or damaging that speech is .

Sometimes , the only option is to remove ourselves from their presence . It's not healthy to let someone bother us that much . I hope you can find a way to manage ( or eliminate ) this situation.
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