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Fed up of this life

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Fed up of this life

Postby Innocuous76 » Thu Mar 29, 2012 5:19 pm

I am/was a very positive and happy person. Content with what I had. Intelligent enough to attain whatever I wanted to in academic life.

All changed with my marriage. Been completely downhill since then. I was tricked into marriage by false pregnancy and then lied and deceived every step of the way for almost 6 years by my wife. Her explanation was that she loved me to extreme and did not want to lose me which is why she did what she did.
I forgave and told her to live a good life. We have had 2 children (very beautiful) and still nothing is improved. She just cries and does nothing whole day, just complains and grouches about life, pretends to be ill and stays more than 13 hours in one room.

She continuously complains shouts and creates scenes for no rhyme or reason. Nothing helps...just pacifies for a day or two and back to same behaviour. Been more than 4 years now.

I was a very peaceful and loving person. COMPLETE opposite now. Each day is a boxing match.

I love my children and always threaten to take them away from me. I seperated from my parents too because of her and later lost my dad whom I could have saved had I been staying with him.

Nothing changes her.
WOrkwise too all I did was dedicate myself to her happiness and what she wants and never concentrated on my career. End result. just living hand to mouth DESPITE having an MBA in finance!
I am in India.

All our neighbours in our buildings laugh on us and our fights. I have tried shouting, screaming, loving her to get throug hto her.. for her life is a curse.
Told her its a gift

doesn't help.
NOW I AM FED UP.
WORKWISE
LIFEWISE

Its better to end it all rather than go through this almost every day.
She will not leave
I have practically told her parents to take her away. She will not go. Neither she will change. Her anger and resentment towards world is getting worse and destroying me

Can't enjoy my life
Can't enjoy my chilren
Can't enjoy my other relation like mother sister (she is always complaining about them too despite they only care for her)

SHE WON"T LEAVE ALSO.
Constantly just gives me grief Only way she is happy if I run around her and make her the centre of my universe. Love her no matter what she does.

SEE no way out except to end my life now. Atleast this nonsense will end. I know its not solution and what will happen to my children and mom. They are all dependant on me.

BTW my wife doesn't work. Says she wants to but doesn't do anything. Just sulks, fights and complains.

Whats the point of this life? No work, every month struggling and then this daily torture at home.

I LOVE MY CHILDREN and cannot even smile with them. She tells me you are happy with everyone else except me. you this you that you this you that..i have bcome like this because of you blah blah blah.

FED UP OF FIGHTING AND DEFENDING and BEING MISERABLE

really don't feel like living or just running away from here
Innocuous76
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Re: Fed up of this life

Postby jasmin » Thu Apr 05, 2012 4:03 pm

Hi, Innocuous76! If she spends 13 hours a day in the same room and does nothing, she might need professional help.. How about finding her a therapist? It has to be someone competent though, someone with experience in treating people with a personality disorder or depression, stuff like that. You could look it up on google for your city.
Please talk here. You don't deserve to suffer like this, you sound like a good person. If it comes to that, you could discuss it with a divorce and custody lawyer.
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Re: Fed up of this life

Postby patchoulijade » Thu Jun 21, 2012 10:01 pm

Hello Innocuous. Your info says you have been with PsychForums since 2/15/07, which gives me encouragement that I too may want to remain a part of this health support program. I hear a lot of suicidal ideation in your story. A lot of wanting to check out. If I may share - prior to this past May 5 (last month) I had been asking God to take me. Over and over again. I even would beg him before the past recent several minor surgeries (prior to wreck) that while under anesthesia please let me go on to be with my Dad and please not let me wake up from anesthesia.

Then on 5/5/12, I was hit by motor vehicle on my vintage repro bicycle that I had named "Happy". He didn't stop at sign and now I have fractures, bulging discs, blah, blah, ad nauseum. But the strangest thing, I was knocked out by the impact, and when I awoke on pavement I spontaneously without forethought etc. just audibly said thank you God, I'm still here.

When we are "very positive" and "happy" people, we attract like person(s). I've had a ton of therapy still in it; and in my past life I attracted liars and deceivers, people with no perception of who they were, wanted to be, etc. If you would like me to share more of my experience, strength, and hope, then let me know. I won't say Iam glad Iam still here; I will admit that in hindsight. I do not always know what is best for me. I center myself around people who are good listeners and have had years of experience, and I am learning to become a goooooood listener. Patchoulijade.
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Re: Fed up of this life

Postby WiseMonkey » Fri Jun 22, 2012 7:22 am

Hi Innocous,

I see that you posted some time ago, so I don't know if things have improved since then..

Wow..What a life you have to live..It sounds like you are at the end of your rope and, even though it sounds like your wife needs therapy big time, I'd suggest you to get help for yourself, any kind of help you can get as this situation is obviously taking a toll on you. You can't force your wife to get help, but you can get help for yourself. I understand though that it might be a problem since you live in India. I just don't know what kind of mental help is available in your country if any. If you don't have an option to see a professional face-to-face, there are websites that offer online counsel/advice, but it's a paid service. Please, research them carefully before you do that though. Make sure that you are dealing with people who have credentials and that the whole business is legitimate.

WM
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