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Start with an EMDR therapist next week.

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Start with an EMDR therapist next week.

Postby Red.Raptor » Sat Aug 15, 2015 10:39 am

I don't know where to start.

Should I come up with a list of all my traumas that i can think of and try to guide the conversation??

Do you think she'll jump straight in or give me some sessions to learn to trust her?

What if i freak out and start crying and shaking?

What if it makes things worse or doesn't help at all?

Should i censor myself? I don't want to get too graphic and prefer not to, but if it helps more to go into detail as far as theraputic-ness I can try to be specific.

I'm so nervous i've never told the truth to anyone in person before and especially to someone i just met. Should i start out slow or just give her full truth??

Sorry for all the questions i'm just everywhere at the moment.
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The Devil has my ear today, I'll never hear a word you say.

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Re: Start with an EMDR therapist next week.

Postby PolarBearStare » Sat Aug 15, 2015 5:39 pm

Starting with a new therapist is wonderful news - congratulations :-) It feels like you're feeling quite nervous about seeing her and worried about what the interaction will bring.

I don't know about EMDR therapy, although I do know about other therapy models, so I'm not sure exactly how she will work with you.

However, in general, I think do whatever feels right for you - it's your space and you've probably got some time to explore the things you need to explore. However, if there are things you feel you would like to say, then it's right to say them. You could even tell her about your dilemma about where to start and explore why you're anxious about not knowing how to share your experience!

It might be wise to keep checking in with yourself and asking yourself "does sharing this thing feel safe at the moment or do we need to build more trust first?" but it's up to you and I'm sure she'll be able to help you to share what you need to.

If you freak out and start crying and shaking, do you think that would be a bad thing? It might be what you need to do to make progress. You could also talk to her about that fear and why you find crying or shaking anxiety provoking.

It sounds like you've got a good idea of some of the things that you'd like to talk about, which is really positive, so you've got a starting point. Ultimately, your therapist should be on your side, so should be able to help you with all the stuff you've posted.

Good luck with your new journey :-)
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Re: Start with an EMDR therapist next week.

Postby Red.Raptor » Sat Aug 15, 2015 6:21 pm

Thank you for the advice. I'm just going to start off by telling her i don't know where to begin. She'll figure it out XD

And be as honest as I can without feeling completely out there.

I don't think the physical reactions are bad, just uncomfortable, and it actually might help i just hate the vulnerability.

Thank you PolarBear!
Little Angel, go away, come again some other day.
The Devil has my ear today, I'll never hear a word you say.

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Re: Start with an EMDR therapist next week.

Postby firelamb67 » Fri Sep 11, 2015 2:21 am

I've been seeing an EMDR therapist for 2 1/2 years. It took me a little over a year before I could tell her I trust her. She's very understanding and supportive and let things come out as I could talk about them.

When it finally came time to do EMDR we made a list of the traumas so we'd both know what we wanted to work on. This was extremely helpful for me.

We started out with the least severe trauma and slowly worked our way up to the harder stuff.

EMDR has a process and if she's good at what she does, she won't push you into anything you're not ready to do.

If it's any consolation, even though I love and trust my therapist I still shake in front of her every session and struggle with maintaining eye contact with her. It's because of deep rooted shame. We've worked through all the traumas now we're working on core blocking beliefs, like my shame etc.

Just tell her how you feel and what your concerns are and she'll work with you on them. I don't think EMDR should start until a strong theraputic relationship and trust is established. You should feel safe with her before you start.
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