Hey, so after thinking about it for a month I finally told my mother who fought depression herself (unsuccessfully) and got an appointment made. I'm excited to know I'm finally getting help, but I'm also scared at the same time. I'm scared that I'll go in there and something will be wrong maybe I don't even have social anxiety, I'll be too scared to tell the truth. I just hate doing new things, I worry so much about whatever I'm doing and worry if I do something wrong everyone around me will judge me.
What I'm also worried about is I don't really know what my problem is. I haven't really left my house for anything other than school since my first year of high school, now a year out of high school. All I know is I want to live a life similar to everyone elses. I want to go places without this constant worry. I want to have a decent amount of friends up from the one friend I have on the internet now. I want to do things without thinking that everyone around me will judge me. I want to not sit in my house all day doing absolutly nothing because I'm scared of trying new things. I want to not be the most socially awkward person on the planet. the last time I had a conversation with a girl was probably grade 8, I'd like to know what it's like to have a girl friend, to feel love. All of these things right now seem so far out of reach but are so easily obtained by everyone around me.
Could someone please tell me what happens at these things and what I should have prepared, what I should know about myself. I thank you all so much and any advice you could give means so much.