Resisted the Urge to steal Today!

I just wanna say that I'm proud today that I resisted the urge to steal. I was almost going to take it and put it in my purse without paying, but I reminded myself of the consequences of stealing, so I stopped myself and put it back. I think it's a great healing achievement today. I'm doing self-therapy for my shoplifting addiction too and it's helping me a lot.

That is a fantastic achievement Naiwen !

Compulsions can be so hard to overcome - you have every right to be proud of yourself .

Well done !

NewSunRising wrote:That is a fantastic achievement Naiwen !

Compulsions can be so hard to overcome - you have every right to be proud of yourself .

Well done !

Yes indeed.

For the record , I'm a compulsive gambler in recovery from a 7 year addiction . I've lost count of how many times it was easier to give in than to fight it off . I was nearly ruined because I couldn't stop myself .

It really does take strength .

Resisted my urge to shoplift today again, instead I paid for the ring I wanted. I'm so proud of myself. I think my reasons for it are not because I don't got the money for the things I want, it's for the thrill of getting away with it, the "high" I feel every time I don't get caught. One trick that's helping the most right now is imagining myself in jail and without my freedom, without my life, my loved ones with me. When I think about what kind of life I'd get if caught, then I can stop myself from shoplifting. I'm once more, very proud of myself today for the honest thing I did. The self-help I'm using says it's important reward yourself if done something good, and I rewarded myself by getting my favourite drink, which is a jasmine green tea.

Another great post !

Which book are you using ? The reward method worked well for me too . I usually went to ice cream though . Something high-quality , that I wouldn't ordinarily pay that much for .

NewSunRising wrote:Another great post !

Which book are you using ? The reward method worked well for me too . I usually went to ice cream though . Something high-quality , that I wouldn't ordinarily pay that much for .

Oh, it's a self-help site and it's "Wiki-how."

That's interesting , I'll check it out .

It's certainly working well for you . That's got to feel empowering .

I used to beat myself up so badly every time I gave in to the compulsion to gamble . It took me a long time to focus on my positive actions instead of the consequences of my negative ones .

From now on, I'm going to stay away from the things that tempt me, that way I won't have to resist my urge to take it without paying for it. I didn't go to any jewelry stores today and I didn't get the urge to steal, so I figured that my primary trigger is pretty jewelry, so I promised myself I'd never go there alone. If I want to go to a jewelry store, I'd ask someone to go in with me because I figured also that when I'm with someone else, I usually don't get tempted by anything, it's really when I'm alone in my triggering environment that I'd act on it. There are plenty of others ways to spend for fun and to reward myself. Like today, I got myself for the good thing I did (avoiding going in jewelry stores), was getting myself my favourite cute Japanese character pencil (that I didn't really need so it counts as leisure spending) and a Starbucks coffee. I got the high I used to get from shoplifting, so the tips the site gave me are working great with me. I'm pretty proud of myself today. So, if you can't resist your urges, avoid your triggers altogether. But first, of course, you gotta identify all of triggers and deal with them one by one. Ask yourself this : "What triggers me to do this or that?" So currently, I'm avoiding any jewelry store because I know that's my primary trigger. After identifying everyone of them, it'll be easier for you to take care of all of them.

@NewSunRising, in your case, you should avoid at all cost, any place where you can gamble, including gambling sites.

That is absolutely spot-on about avoiding the places and things that trigger us . I also learned to analyze the feelings that triggered me . Stress and boredom were the biggest ones . When I got the urge to gamble , I started an internal conversation with myself :

Brain : I really want to gamble right now .
Me: Why ?
Brain : I'm bored .
Me : Is there anything healthier I can do to not be bored ?
Brain : Gambling is fun and exciting .
Me : Gambling ruins my finances and makes me feel ashamed and guilty after .
Brain : I don't want to feel like that . I could go to the library and get a new book .

When I wanted to gamble because of stress , I forced my brain to acknowledge that although it was a temporary escape , in the end it just resulted in even more stress . It was a vicious cycle . But I really had to think this out step by step for it to be effective . Those " in my head " conversations helped me many times .

Thanks for the input Naiwen . I am happy to say that I haven't gambled in 2 years . I still get thoughts about it , and last night I even dreamed I had gambled !

I woke up feeling horrible , until I realized it was only a dream . Huge relief ...