Alex I have much shame and regret, I would love to move on, but its seeming very difficult for me to do, facing these dilemmas. I know it will be very difficult to find a good man who can accept these things about me. That is of course why it would be far easier to not tell, but that seems wrong too. Patience is my greatest virtue, sometimes lol. Its been 3 years since I have had sex
Jeffery thats the thing though, I DONT expect anyone to just accept this about me. If he doesnt like it, thats because he is a self respecting man who doenst want to be with a woman who spent so much of her life having no respect for herself. It doesnt mean that hes not my type or not someone I wouldnt want to be around and be with. My past does and would come back to haunt me from very benign ways. Stuff in the media sparks conversations amongst family and friends. I have heard many derogatory things said about hookers or those who have willingly participated in incest just in some random conversation (ok not so much the incest but it could happen). These things hurt me but of course whoever is saying them has no clue that they are saying things that are directly insulting and hurting me.
You are right though, the stds alone would be deal breakers for most men (its nothing fatal), so the likely hood of me actually getting to the point in a relationship where I would tell these things is real slim.
Thank you both for your input, it is much appreciated.