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Is it possible i've forgotten?

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Is it possible i've forgotten?

Postby Georgiaann » Tue Jun 19, 2012 9:48 am

Hello I'm Georgia, i'm 18 and I'm new!

When I was a little girl I was sexually abused. Up till recently I had completely forgotten the abuse. I have severe anxiety and don't trust people. Neither me or my councillors could figure out why, we just assumed it was due to a bad family life. However about a year and a half ago I started having flashbacks, only little snippets. For example, I was sat on the stairs with my friend when I had a really strong memory of saying 'no' to someone and this horrid feeling of dread.
I remember that account vividly now, I was 7 years old. I was sitting on the stairs of someones house, they was supposed to be looking after me. I was upset about something so I was crying. They told me to shut up because I was making them hard. I didn't understand, i was only a little girl. Then they asked me if i wanted to see and I said no. They made me touch them and i didn't want to, I just kept crying. After they said they had been 'naughty' and said sorry. I never told anyone, they never said to keep quiet or anything, I just knew it was wrong.
Anyway, recently I was round a friend and they where being too 'touchy' for my liking and kept grabbing my boobs and trying to take my top off, i told them no and they kept saying 'I'm only joking' and un-did my bra. I pushed them away and got someone to pick me up and take me home. I cried the whole night after. Since then I keep having these flashbacks again, and like the last time they are very short and dont amount to much. There's one where I'm telling someone to get out of my bed because 'i dont like it'.
I'm petrified of relationships now. I know i'm only young but whenever someone takes an interest in me I shy away, I don't want to be hurt again.

Could it be more happened and I've forgotten? is that something that happens?
Georgiaann
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Re: Is it possible i've forgotten?

Postby WiseMonkey » Tue Jun 19, 2012 6:16 pm

Hi Georgiaann and welcome to the forum,

First off, I am very sorry you were abused as a child and it also sounds like there was an attempt to abuse you when you were an adult (may be more than one incident?).

To answer your question, it could be that more happened to you in the past than you remember but so long as you don't remember no one will know that for sure. I'd recommend that you give those experiences of past abuses more attention in your therapy. I believe that those kinds of incidents deserve more attention from you and your therapist. Talk to your therapist about it and, meanwhile, you can keep talking about it here.

WM
"Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."-Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Re: Is it possible i've forgotten?

Postby Georgiaann » Tue Jun 19, 2012 10:31 pm

Thankyou for responding! I was scared to post on here because what happened to be seemed so little compared to some other peoples incidents.
I don't know how to bring it up with my therapist, I don't know what to say
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Re: Is it possible i've forgotten?

Postby WiseMonkey » Tue Jun 19, 2012 11:46 pm

You can tell your therapist the same thing you posted here.

WM
"Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."-Martin Luther King, Jr.
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