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daddy raped me *Trigger warning*

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daddy raped me *Trigger warning*

Postby s costa » Sun Aug 07, 2011 9:36 am

Daddy molest and raped me!!

Hi my name is Sarai I live in NJ, I am happily married with four children but I still deal with terrors of my past. I would like to share my story in extreme details. As far back I can remember I was always afraid to be alone with my dad and now that I think about it I know now why. As a little girl my father use to molest me and touch me in a perverted manner. He always use to play with me wrestle with me just to touch my body and I did not know nothing at the time since I was a little girl. When I was about 12 Years old I then felt very uncomfortable in the way he use to look at me and touch me. He use to come to my bed at night and touch me, kiss me, suck my breast, put his tongue in my ear, and touch me every where this happened for so many nights. I use to be scare to go to sleep at night because I knew what was going to happen. Then when I became a little older about 14 everything I wanted came with a price. For example, once I wanted a body suit and my father made me take a shower with him washing me. I also, wanted a phone and my father did the same thing touch me every night doing the same thing over. He would try to find any excuse to touch me. Either by playing with me like wrestling, or by doing the things he did to me at night. I never said nothing until the age of about 15 to a couple of social workers and then they told my mom and they took my father out of the house and my mom did not believe me. My father called me and I felt bad and told him that I was sorry "because I was afraid and didn't wanted him to separate from my mom nor go to jail". so I denied everything to the social worker, the school, my mom, and everybody else that knew just so my father wouldn't have a bad reputation nor go to jail nor separate from my mom. After I did all this my father was then allowed in the house and then in the kitchen while there was no one he told me "now nobody ever will never believe you again". the molestation continued until I left the house at the age of 17, but it did not stop here. I got married at the age of 17 and my father always use to talk to me innapropriately about sex and when I was alone with him still he would touch me and hug me and tell me that I was his favorite little girl. He would hug me, kiss me, and try to touch me. He then came with the idea of letting him teach me how to make a man happy in bed by him sleeping with me and this went on for years and I always use to avoid him but he use to come to my house and try to kiss me, touch me, hug me and tell me nasty words in spanish. Until one day at the age of 28 he coerced me to have sex with him. The night before I knew that he was coming for that reason and I could not sleep I was so afraid of him that I did not had the guts to tell him no. The next day he came over and made me take a shower and he washed me, and then he told me to stay naked and go to one of the bedrooms and lay down. Then he started to have oral sex with me asking me to move my hips while he was eating me and to touch his dick as well but I refused and covered my face with my pillow because I was afraid. When he finished eating me then he came on top of me and had sex with me trying to kiss me, but I kept on covering my face with the pillow. Then he came inside of me and got up and then left my house. I felt so disgusted that I took a shower and felt really bad and stupid about it. Then thereafter he had the guts a couple of days later to ask me if I was pregnant of him. In which I was not. This went on for about 2 more years, the touching me and looking at me inappropriately and telling me that I should go visit him while my mom was not there but I never did because I knew what was his intentions still. I feel bad because I was not strong enough to tell him no and stop! because I was so afraid of him and still am. I am since remarried and I've told my husband everything and he is trying to help me deal with it. I have told my family once again and no one believes me they wont even speak to me no more and my father is mad at me and saying that he never did those horrible things to me and my mother wont speak to me as well nor my sister. She says that I am a liar and that I am only doing this to get help from the government. In which is not true, why would I make up such horrible things. I wish this has never happened to me but it did. One last thing that I don't understand and will never know is how come my mother never knew or had any instinct at all when he was out of his bed every night to molest me. I am now a strange from my family and I am starting on my road to recovery but I'm only beginning. I have been told by people in my family to forget and forgive but they don't have to live with this I do. This is my story!
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Re: daddy raped me *Trigger warning*

Postby yankintheuk » Sun Aug 07, 2011 11:31 pm

I am so sorry to hear of your story. You are such a strong person to be dealing with all of this. My heart goes out to you.
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Re: daddy raped me *Trigger warning*

Postby CrackedGirl » Mon Aug 08, 2011 1:15 pm

I am really sorry to hear about the things you have been through. Your father has behaved appalingly and I am so sorry your family are siding with him and have ostrasised you. What happened was not your fault and you are not to blame in any way at all. Have you ever had any professional help with any of this? I really think that it would be of benefit to you if you have not. Please post all you want, ppl are listening.

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