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Mom watches me bath...

Open Discussions About Sexual Abuse and Incest.

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Mom watches me bath...

Postby AbnFK » Mon Jan 02, 2017 6:24 pm

Hi,
I will try to keep this short, unlike my previous posts. I don't think anybody would be able to help me, but I have to get this out of my chest.
I'm a 17 year old male from Bangladesh (located in Asia).
I'm still a student, unemployed, supposed to graduate the 10th grade this year.
My mom is horribly emotionally abusive; had been this way since I was like 5 or so - can't remember too well.
I'm leaving out the emotional abuse here and instead focus on her obsession with my looks and cleanliness; which had led to her watching me bath almost every day.
It had started several months ago; can't be sure about how many. On that day, I didn't bath properly; just splashed some water on my body and left the bathroom. I believe I was going through a period of depression; cleaning myself properly was one of the last things I could care about.
Well, she noticed I didn't bath properly - so she made me bath in front of her, probably while verbally harassing me.
It has been that way since.
She watches me bath, harshly gives me bathing instructions, get mad for no reason, curses me because I am a grown up yet she has to ensure I bath properly; while I am clad in a towel covering my nether region.
She has a serious obsession with my looks. She makes me shave my facial hairs, decides what hairstyle to wear, makes me brush three times a day...
Well, she also makes sure I shave my underarm hair pubic and pubic hair. Guess what? I have to show her.
I can't really seem to sort it all out in my head, so my writing is disorganized.
Well, I can't really figure out how to write what I feel like here, so I guesss that's all for now.
I want to escape this hell, but I have no chance of doing so...
(Please check out my other threads if you want to learn more about my family and my past/present. Thank you so much for your time.)
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Re: Mom watches me bath...

Postby Team78 » Sat Jan 14, 2017 1:56 am

Great flow of ideas in great detail indeed. I guess shouldn't be so down on yourself. I don't maybe a nervous use of words something soooooo shameful even the strong can stumble on words time and again that has happened to people that made me question that there is comfort. Disorganized would literally be re telling of events not in sequential order not necessarily what you didn't share. Possibly shoe on a hand or something. Anyway totally fine writing. I'm sorry about the abuse and remember it is never your fault.
Dx: DID, PTSD, Panic Disorder

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Re: Mom watches me bath...

Postby fairie » Sun Jan 29, 2017 9:13 pm

I had this tipe of situation when in hospital. My mom just forced me to bath and stayed in the room . She used the excuse that I am handicaped and can't wash. I was shaking of anger shaking two days in a row.
At home the bath door has windows and I feel without intimacy
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