feel like giving up

Imperius wrote:The statistics might be grim, but we are not just defined by our illness or some number in the DSM-5. We can do great things too. Things are really looking up on my side. I am going back for a masters and I just had 2 phone interviews with companies. If you put in the hardwork, people will recognize it. I didn't realize this when I was an undergrad and didn't take my studies seriously. Now I know how much I have learned and I still need to learn. For you I present a quote from Batman Begins: "The training is nothing. The will is everything. The will to act.

I guess I'll have to keep trying, but my will to study is really low.

Hi, I didn't read the whole post, one of those 'too long, didn't read', things.

I may still have something to contribute. I'm having flashbacks to my experiences. I remember in the middle of getting my Bachelor of Science degree that my world was closing in on me. Everything that could go wrong - did. Everybody abandoned and isolated me.

The only thing that kept me going is the thought that 'there is no reason that I can not sit down, study, and do well in school'.

It is one of those stupid 'pull yourself up by the bootstraps' type of advice. It is all I got. I did it. At least if you do not get your degree, make sure there is an incredibly good reason why you didn't. Being isolated and harassed is a good reason, but it really shouldn't stop you from 'hitting the books', and completing your education.

I am saying this from a place of compassion and empathy. Take care.

crazysurvival wrote:Hi, I didn't read the whole post, one of those 'too long, didn't read', things.

I may still have something to contribute. I'm having flashbacks to my experiences. I remember in the middle of getting my Bachelor of Science degree that my world was closing in on me. Everything that could go wrong - did. Everybody abandoned and isolated me.

The only thing that kept me going is the thought that 'there is no reason that I can not sit down, study, and do well in school'.

It is one of those stupid 'pull yourself up by the bootstraps' type of advice. It is all I got. I did it. At least if you do not get your degree, make sure there is an incredibly good reason why you didn't. Being isolated and harassed is a good reason, but it really shouldn't stop you from 'hitting the books', and completing your education.

I am saying this from a place of compassion and empathy. Take care.

That sucks that you were abandoned and isolated. Congratulations on getting a bachelor's degree despite that. I used to study all of the time, but dropping out kid of broke me, in that I feel no confidence that I can accomplish anything anymore, that and the schizophrenia. Thank you for the concern.

sea00115699 wrote:

SailorMan wrote:I feel the same way and have been failing classes this year, senior year in high school. I've never been a 4.0 student because I just am not that interested in school work. According to standardized tests I am in the top percentile of intelligence, but I don't do homework. Last summer when I became severely depressed I did, and still do, want to die but I don't want to kill myself. I think the only thing keeping me going is that I owe it to my parents for all they have given to me and all their work with and for me, but I still do not know why I can't get myself to do anything. My hobbies, previously high in number, have become nothing but decoration in my mind and my house, tools and equipment sit for me to pick up and mess around with in my room, but never to actually use. I started off on Zoloft a while ago and it helped me stop feeling so terrible but I still feel empty. I thin I am going to get a higher dosage and see if I can't just artificially lift myself up so I can start actually doing things. I am no fan of using drugs to alter myself but I feel that I have no other choice right NOW because I am so lazy and immobile. Maybe with more Zoloft I can get into a more productive mindset and carry that on with or without the ill in the future.

Yeah I have thoughts of killing myself too, but not nearly as much as I used to a year ago. I am interested in doing school work, cuz I used to have really high grades before this illness, but I struggle now to get a B while taking two classes at a time. It's just getting the motivation. Yeah I would feel bad about killing myself cuz I think it would make my family sad. My room is a mess too, and I've given up on all hobbies. I just listen to music and visit forums now most of the time, and barely get myself to do my homework. I just got a motivational speech from my psychologist, yes I'm lucky and I have one, and it's like it all went in one ear and out the other. Go ahead and try the antidepressants, they helped me, but I stopped taking them because they were giving me horrible nightmares.




I hope Im responding the right way on this site, dont exactly understand how i'm supposed to respond cause there isn't a respond button. I am the same way with not being able to get myself to do anything. Then I feel bad, cause i did'nt get anything done. My room starts getting a mess, than that makes me feel like a slob. So clean up, feel cleaned up inside i guess.

Sometimes if I can't get myself to do something I just sit around, and the pressure builds so much , like i should be doing something, that kind of automatically I just start making my self do things. It's lke the pain of sitting around and doing nothing , and feeling like nothing is worse then doing something.

I think our brains are hardwired to reward us when we do something good , so i feel good. Maybe it's just cutting the grass, or doing the dishes. Honestly , it can pretty hard , but if you want a way to get yourself moving without having to press your will , feels sometimes like against the grain, just let yourself get really bored, then you'll start doing someting.

CArpe Diem, enjoy the moment for all it's worth. We have are ups' and downs...sometimes im busy, sometimes im a lazy sb. Another way is to make one goal, focus on it for like a week or ten days, and forget about everything else. That can get you in gear sometimes to. Hang in there,Sincerely, Josh

freefee wrote:

sea00115699 wrote:

SailorMan wrote:I feel the same way and have been failing classes this year, senior year in high school. I've never been a 4.0 student because I just am not that interested in school work. According to standardized tests I am in the top percentile of intelligence, but I don't do homework. Last summer when I became severely depressed I did, and still do, want to die but I don't want to kill myself. I think the only thing keeping me going is that I owe it to my parents for all they have given to me and all their work with and for me, but I still do not know why I can't get myself to do anything. My hobbies, previously high in number, have become nothing but decoration in my mind and my house, tools and equipment sit for me to pick up and mess around with in my room, but never to actually use. I started off on Zoloft a while ago and it helped me stop feeling so terrible but I still feel empty. I thin I am going to get a higher dosage and see if I can't just artificially lift myself up so I can start actually doing things. I am no fan of using drugs to alter myself but I feel that I have no other choice right NOW because I am so lazy and immobile. Maybe with more Zoloft I can get into a more productive mindset and carry that on with or without the ill in the future.

Yeah I have thoughts of killing myself too, but not nearly as much as I used to a year ago. I am interested in doing school work, cuz I used to have really high grades before this illness, but I struggle now to get a B while taking two classes at a time. It's just getting the motivation. Yeah I would feel bad about killing myself cuz I think it would make my family sad. My room is a mess too, and I've given up on all hobbies. I just listen to music and visit forums now most of the time, and barely get myself to do my homework. I just got a motivational speech from my psychologist, yes I'm lucky and I have one, and it's like it all went in one ear and out the other. Go ahead and try the antidepressants, they helped me, but I stopped taking them because they were giving me horrible nightmares.




I hope Im responding the right way on this site, dont exactly understand how i'm supposed to respond cause there isn't a respond button. I am the same way with not being able to get myself to do anything. Then I feel bad, cause i did'nt get anything done. My room starts getting a mess, than that makes me feel like a slob. So clean up, feel cleaned up inside i guess.

Sometimes if I can't get myself to do something I just sit around, and the pressure builds so much , like i should be doing something, that kind of automatically I just start making my self do things. It's lke the pain of sitting around and doing nothing , and feeling like nothing is worse then doing something.

I think our brains are hardwired to reward us when we do something good , so i feel good. Maybe it's just cutting the grass, or doing the dishes. Honestly , it can pretty hard , but if you want a way to get yourself moving without having to press your will , feels sometimes like against the grain, just let yourself get really bored, then you'll start doing someting.

CArpe Diem, enjoy the moment for all it's worth. We have are ups' and downs...sometimes im busy, sometimes im a lazy sb. Another way is to make one goal, focus on it for like a week or ten days, and forget about everything else. That can get you in gear sometimes to. Hang in there,Sincerely, Josh

thank you. You're right, just getting a goal to do anything is good. I do feel better after I do something. I managed to study four hours today, and got through one of the four chapters that is going to be on the last test of the semester, and finished my homework for the week. Thanks for the encouragement. I've been getting emotional support and ideas from family and my psychologist and people in this forum, and I think it has helped.

So I finished the semester, and got a B in the accounting class. I've decided to give up on becoming an accountant. The second half of the class I got two C's on the tests and it went way over my head, and that is the entry level class, which is supposed to be easy. I thought I was smarter and would just get it, but apparently not. Now I'm frustrated because I'm left trying to figure out what I want to do with my life all over again. I've decided that I'm going to get an office professional certificate from community college, and then try and finish a bachelor's degree in biology, and then I'm going to try to get into healthcare as a radiologic technologist or something like that. I feel so frustrated, especially since I'm still afraid of driving a car in a crowded city, where everything is. The problem is I live in the suburbs next to all of these major cities, and I just have to learn how to drive, but I can't. I technically have a driver's license, but I'm not sure how. I'm on summer vacation for another week now. I still feel like giving up, even though I just saw a bunch of people that were telling me that even if it takes longer I shouldn't give up. I just feel like such a failure, and wonder how I'm ever going to do anything or get a job if I can't even get enough courage to drive a car.