PerplexedMan wrote:I didn't receive any diagnosis whilst in the ward. All they said to me was that I had a polymorphic psychosis. I was also transiently in and out of dellusional paranoia. I started to believe that I was accused of terrorism and that I was going to be captured and tortured. Or that the whole ward was trying to farm me for organs and such horrible dellusions. I ended up trying to kill myself due to the paranoia (better die than be tortured) .
I had to look up “polymorphic psychosis.” Brief Psychotic Disorder. Your delusions sound like they were really scary. That sounds so horrible...I’m glad you’re out of it now. My delusions were more grandiose. I thought I was a prophet or, on especially grandiose days, the son of God. I thought my moods dictated the weather. I thought the government was following me and that everyone knew who I was. I also thought people were trying to poison me. Led to a lot of weight loss because I didn’t trust most foods. I also thought my water pipes were rigged with acid (if that makes any sense), so I showered infrequently as well. Weird to think about now as I’ve never experienced anything like that again, and it’s been over 10 years. That’s why I think it was the SSRIs.
PerplexedMan wrote:I still believe some of the medication I was given contributed to this hightened state, in addition of course to the type of people who were interned there. Some of them seemed quite aggressive. It even said on the official site of the ward that some patients suffer from antisocial personality disorder and a lot of them were doing drugs or dealing them.
You think meds initially made you more paranoid? When I was on the ward, at least half of the people there were there for substance abuse. I thought it was odd they were in a psychiatric hospital for that. And you know from your experience how irritable addicts without their fix can get, so I can see how that made you more paranoid.
PerplexedMan wrote:I'm not too sure what my trigger was but I remember having some emotional issues at the time that were being actively repressed and some serious lack of sleep. I am seeing a psychologist at the moment to get to the bottom of it all.
I hope you'll get back to your old self soon. It sounds like you're doing all the right things and, with any luck, this will be a one-time experience.