The worst monster of them all.

I'm just so sincerely sorry. I truly didn't want to hurt her. I created lies because I didn't feel like I was enough. The lies built up and I didn't know how to undo what I had done. I truly feel devistated and hurt over all that I've done to her. I don't wanna lie to anyone. I didn't want or mean I hurt her. And yeah, I do care for her. Even though the relationship was full of lies, I did truly fall in love with her. I loved spending time with her, making love to her, just doing anything with her. I'm in pieces. Just....pieces.

I think that it is important that you learn to forgive yourself. You have certainly done wrong by a person and you should try to make it right – but to call yourself a monster of the worst kind is taking it a step too far. I hope that you find solace in our otherwise meaningless words and find a way to make things for both you and her.