andi wrote:All I am saying is please, PLEASE think long and carefully about this, and PLEASE do not do anything rash in say the next 5 or 10 years. This is such a delicate situation, and I am not sure either of you are thinking about this rationally right now, you are just too caught up in the excitement of it all.
Thanks for your comment "andi", I love all that you say and whole heartedly agree. We've certainly been giving it time and working on ourselves and making sure that we don't rush anything. I'm also not sure if we'll ever be able to expose the whole truth about our relationship, to our family or the public as a whole. I'm actually pretty certain of it. Society is just not ready for anything like this.
We've both been through unsuccessful marriages and we're actually fine with the idea of just living together "and getting old together" as (half) brother and sister. The "blessing" we experience of being in each other's company, is so wonderful, that neither of us could ever ask for more, even if it does exclude a sexual relationship. Should it happen that we engage in sexual activity from time to time, it's no-one's business and need not be part of how we're "defined" out there.
I'm not trying to rationalize it, but trying to be real and see it for what this really is.
We're both highly educated, live in great communities and have good incomes and there should be no reason why we could not choose to live our lives that way.
I am also sure, that given our history and the story of how we all (me and my biological family) met each other again, that both our mother and sister would approve of us just being together and just be happy for this time (whatever that means - be it 5 years, be it 50 years). I also think that since we're all older (40's and 30's), the choice is a "life choice" and not the choice of a teenager, or of younger, less informed people (not reflecting badly on your situation, but thinking about it from eg our mother's perspective). It should almost be no different than someone saying they're gay and wanted to live with a "life partner" for the rest of their life.
Again, thank you for your insight and comment, it is much appreciated.
-- Mon Jan 30, 2012 9:37 am --
I also want to ask another question - what if sexuality was not part of the scenario? I ask, because I don't want to make it the central theme of the post, since our attraction is spiritual and emotional and the physical is merely a by-product of the amazing and happy emotional connection we share (as it should be in any relationship). What if we were merely "a brother and sister living together", after both had unsuccessful marriages - is that something that society could accept?
We both have children (older children) and they get along wonderfully. I don't have any disputes with my wife and our separation was very amicable. Why can't this be a scenario where two people who get along and trust each other because they're related, just decide to share their space for an extended period of time?
Again, I'm not trying to rationalize it, but this is truly our reality.