What to do about old "friends"

A few weeks ago, I ran into an old friend, rather, acquaintance. We grew up in the same neighborhood, and we knew a lot of the same people. We were never really close friends, but we would hang out together from time to time. Well, I saw this person for the first time in 10 years 2 weeks ago. She was glad to see me, and we talked for about 10 minutes. She lives in the area that I live in, but I really do not want to hang out with her. It's not that I feel like I am better than her, but we were never really close friends anyway. I have also heard from some of my family members that she is still doing a lot of the negative things that she was doing 10 years ago. She's not a bad person, she just has a lot of people hanging around her house and children. My old friends think that I am acting like I am "too good" for them, but I am not. People change, grow up, and move on with their lives. I am a wife and mother and not on the club scene anymore. What should I feel bad for having grown up, and distanced myself from people who continue to shirk their responsibilities and act like children. Any advice?

Hi emotionless81,

I think it's really all relative - your old friends believe in how they live is the right way and you believe in your own ways. Like you said, you've grown up and whilst your old friends have pursued different matters in their life and accordingly prioritised it, so have you. The truth of right and wrong becomes blurry. So you should try to think objectively about them.

We all have different priorities and responsibilities in our lives and that changes with how we mature. Moreover, we mature in different ways from each other and that might be why you may be questioning whether you are comparatively better than them in that sense.

Maybe try giving your old friends the benefit of the doubt, as cliched as it sounds. It doesn't hurt see how they're going as long as they don't negatively influence you. If you naturally believe your old friends aren't inherently bad people, give them a chance.

Hope this helps.

"What should I feel bad for having grown up, and distanced myself from people who continue to shirk their responsibilities and act like children. Any advice?" - emotionless81, I agree with you.. for me it's not as much look's or failer's wich drive me away from people but it's the juvinial behaviour becomeing embraced instead of phased out.