My mother hates my boyfriend! HELP!

my boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over a year and my mother hates him. his family loves me and we get along really well, but my mother doesnt like him because "hes not good enough for me". i am in college and he should be too, but he decided to work instead. i know my boyfriend is the "one" and we will be together forever. we love each other very very much, and my mom knows that, but she still rolls her eyes every time he comes over and every time i talk about him. she gets mad when he comes to family events and parties. she talks about him behind his back and tries to turn my other family against him. i really dont know what to do. he and i always get in fights about my mother and how i should stand up to her. i feel like i have done everything i can.

someone please help me!!!

i know i need to stand up for myself. i have been for a long time. the thing about my mother is that she always feels she knows what is best for me, even when i know it isnt. it's so hard to just tell her to back off and let me make my own decisions because 1. i'm afraid to disappoint her and have her be mad at me, and 2. shes just so controlling that it's almost impossible to get her to let me make my own decisions. she feels that it doesn't matter how old i am, she will always be in my life. she feels that i am not mature enough to know whats best for me. it really hurts, and i have talked to her a TRILLION times about this but it does not get through to her. i just, i don't know what else to do.

Hi, psychbabe23. You could be cold and not respond when she's around or when she asks you something. My mother is a lot like this and the only way to have a little peace is letting her know through my behaviour that I just don't give a damn what she thinks. I know your situation is probably a bit different, but if talking to her about it doesn't help, try your best to avoid her untill she gets the message.
If she wants to see you, tell her you're busy, if she calls tell her you're busy and be uninterested. It's ok to be afraid that you will hurt her feelings but she is the one responsable for her behaviour, not you. This is a consequence she'll have to accept. Don't give in and don't try to reason with her, I have a feeling it will get you nowhere. I think you should stop having a close relationship with her, at least for a while.

She is your mother, and she will always be worrying about you. However, she is going to have to come to realize that you are not a little girl anymore, even though you will always be her little girl you're an adult now and can make your own choices in life.

If you have a healthy relationship with your boyfriend, a truly pure loving relationship and you know the both of you want to be with each other for the rest of your lives then don't let anything stop you two.

But if your mother has legitimate reason of disapproving of this guy, such as: being controlling, abusive , drug or alcohol user

then she has a right, but if not then she must accept him.

I hope this helps you.