I relate and feel the same way you do, 332. If I'm totally honest, I do want to have "sex" with, a 5 year old boy, and I admit it -- but it's something I cannot have, no ifs ands or buts; and if I "slip" it will ruin not only my life but a little, adorable kid's...not to mention his family's.
It's not easy at all, and I've only felt this way after going through a lot, but I feel my attractions are my lot in life and I just have to play the cards I'm dealt.
I try to find legal and appropriate things to fill that empty space that are fulfilling, even if it's not 100% what I would like. I can usually find things that make me almost as happy as being around kids.
Been doing pretty well with it -- and have been in a relationship 3 years now. I never thought I would say that.
It is possible to live with this and ways to live comfortably.
At least from my experience, you have to live with it rather than against it. Like instead of forcing yourself to never look at a kid in public (a futile act, perhaps), maybe look to the count of 3 and then look away. It releases the pressure value feeling I can get by thinking "don't look, don't look, don't look."