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Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

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Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby guest0929 » Sat Dec 01, 2012 11:01 am

What is a pedophile? Is it someone who has an 'attraction' to children/minors or someone who has
a 'sexual attraction' to children/minors? Or both?

How about someone who only fantasizes sexually about children/minors but doesn't actually live it out in real life? In other words, does one become a pedophile for just thinking such thoughts or does one become a pedophile only IF they physically act upon it (attempt to molest kids).

Now the legal issue poses a big problem. If the legal age is 18, then if a man is sexually attracted to a 17 year old girl, does that make him a pedophile? If so, then are men supposed to NOT BE ATTRACTED to 17 year old girls and think they are ugly and repulsive, but then 24 hours later when they turn 18 on their birthday, now it is ok for an adult man to find an 18 year old girl attractive? Doesn't anyone else see the problem with this?

If pedophilia is diagnosed at the moment of anything "physically performed"...ie., attempted molestation, attempted visit of a minor's house (like on NBC's To Catch A Predator), then most men are not pedophiles. But if being attracted to a 15 or 16 or 17 year old girl and having sexual thoughts about her but not doing anything physically, also makes you a pedophile, then wouldn't that make MOST MEN in this world a pedo?

The reason why I ask this is because I've conducted my own research ONLINE. Now we need to understand that most men online in chatrooms are seeking sexual chat and most often they are horny and would probably **** a furry animal if you were one that could chat. I posed as a female (just like they do on NBC's To Catch A Predator). I don't elicit or provoke any chats. I wait for men to open and guide the chat. I simply respond and oblige to their requests. I never tell them my age at first. I never say I'm 13 or 14 or 17 or 20 or 28. It would contaminate the research. They ask for my pics and I send them pictures (non-nude, no sexually explicit or suggestive pictures, just regular face shots) of underage girls. Now in my mind, I'm thinking, once they see the picture is a young or little girl, they would just stop the chat and say, 'you look too young, sorry bye.' But most of them respond very pleased, 'wow! you're a cutie' or 'wow! you're sexy' and various other responses like these and then continue the chat leading to sexual chats...and it gets explicit...very detailed, and graphic about sex (just like decoys do on 'To Catch A Predator'). The only difference is, I don't set up a trap house to lure the men over and then have them caught on camera and arrested afterwards.

My personal research clearly and heavily shows that MEN are attracted to and/or find YOUNG GIRLS attractive and sexually attractive. Once again, they don't know that she might be 13 or 16. She might actually be 18 or 20. All they know is how she looks and whether or not they are sexually attracted to her or not. 90% of the time, the men are and pursue detailed sexual activities and even want to go further such as camshows, exchange phone numbers, and even meet up for friendly engagement.

So the issue I'm getting at is, I'm not sure how we can tell men who to find sexually attractive or not regardless of age. Nature is what nature is. Is it evil? Is it wrong? Attraction is attraction. But to 'act' upon it and to cause physical bodily harm is wrong, i think we can all agree on that. Unless, we are saying that to "think" about minors in that way is also illegal, then we have a big problem in this world and most men would technically be PEDOPHILES.

What are your thoughts?
Please share any comments or questions.
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby ReVamp » Sat Dec 01, 2012 3:27 pm

Actually, it's 13 and under.

/thread.
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby *starbright* » Sat Dec 01, 2012 4:00 pm

- My thought is that an object of 13 is not pedophilic. Pictures of 7 year-olds would be pedophilic.
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby Archeopendra » Sat Dec 01, 2012 5:07 pm

I think you could make a strong case that humans (men, women, etc.) are indeed attracted to people under eighteen. Ephebophilia is actually more what you're referring to though. Pedophilia is supposed to refer more specifically to those who haven't started puberty yet.

What's the distinction between the seventeen and 355/356ths year old versus the eighteen year old? Just what you said, how we define what is 'old enough.' In puberty, teens start growing into charactoristics that we understand as desirable. They don't just appear on their eighteenth birthday, so why should attraction not follow suit? I personally doubt the strength of an argument about a tendency for pedophilia though.


Our human biology sucks :(
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby guest0929 » Sun Dec 02, 2012 8:15 am

I guess all I want is the world to admit that men can be, will be, and are sexually attracted to little girls / young girls bodies and there's nothing wrong with that....BUT to knowingly and intentionally take advantage of an underage girl that leads to physical violation and physical/mental/emotional abuse is WRONG.

It upsets me that if being attracted to little / young girls makes you a pedophile (and then that word makes you the most evil and vile disgusting human being on the planet that should be castrated, tortured, torn to pieces, shot 100 times, resurrected and repeated x1000 times), then most men should be given this treatment too. I think the big difference is those who actually commit a crime and hurt someone vs those who are simply wired to be attracted to certain things. But if anyone were to attempt to go public with this kind of message, you'd still be branded as a sicko pedophile who should be put behind bars for life and banned from children.

Here is the interesting video discussion about the topic by Joe Rogan's daytime podcast:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3NpPxqISOL0
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby shipwrecked heart » Mon Dec 03, 2012 12:54 am

Allow me to sum up:

No.
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby The Beholder » Tue Dec 04, 2012 5:51 am

here's what i don't get. boys hit puberty between 11 and 13, and girls often earlier. i've never heard of anyone who reached puberty and only found themselves attracted to people over 13. yet only a few years later, they inevitably find themselves horrified by the idea of being attracted to anyone under 14, or even 16. that can't be natural, can it? that sounds like some kind of mental block to me. like a conditioned revulsion.

then there's the fact that i was attracted to girls as young as 2 from as soon as i was attracted to anyone.
nothing justifies doing something sexually to someone that they did not invite. this should not need saying, but apparently people forget.
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby guest0929 » Wed Dec 05, 2012 11:21 am

shipwrecked heart wrote:Allow me to sum up:

No.


No? You need to be more detailed and descriptive about what you are talking about.
According to the legal definition of pedophilia, YES, you would be a pedophile. If you are guy, you can't
tell me that you don't find 17 year old girls sexually attractive, but you find 18 year olds sexually attractive.

So under the legal definition, probably 90% of men are actually pedophiles. Maybe not PRACTICING pedophiles, but in their minds and hearts, they are attracted.

The clinical definition of pedophilia is pre-pubescent (so under say 12 years old or younger). So, in that case, maybe no. Maybe 30-40% of men are actually sexually attracted to little girls, but 60-70% find little girls sexually UNattractive.

So to sum it up:
Yes, most men are pedophiles under the legal definition.
No, most men are not pedophiles under the clinical defintion.

98% of men won't actually act or commit any sexual action towards minors or girls even though most of them find them sexually attractive and would in a fantasy world.
2% of men do act upon their true feelings and try to engage actitivities with girls under 18.

And let's not forget, if a 12 year old boy has the hots for a 12 year old girl and he masterbates to her, and tries to physically and sexually pursue her, how is he also not a pedophile?? So a 12 year old boy is old enough to be sexually attracted to a 12 year old girl, but all of a sudden an 18 year old guy is supposed to find 12 year old girls unattractive now? Like how does that work in the brain? What I'm saying is that he probably still finds her sexually attractive but now that he's 18, he WON'T act upon it and commit any action to getitng sexually involved with her because of the law.
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby Archeopendra » Wed Dec 05, 2012 3:19 pm

guest0929 wrote:According to the legal definition of pedophilia, YES, you would be a pedophile.


What is the legal definition? I would think that the law would recognize the APA's definition, they are just fast and loose with the word itself. If you mean how the word is used in general society, you'll be hard pressed to find one definition to pin on it.

guest0929 wrote:If you are guy, you can't tell me that you don't find 17 year old girls sexually attractive, but you find 18 year olds sexually attractive.


Well *I* find neither attractive...

guest0929 wrote:So under the legal definition, probably 90% of men are actually pedophiles. Maybe not PRACTICING pedophiles, but in their minds and hearts, they are attracted.

The clinical definition of pedophilia is pre-pubescent (so under say 12 years old or younger). So, in that case, maybe no. Maybe 30-40% of men are actually sexually attracted to little girls, but 60-70% find little girls sexually UNattractive.

So to sum it up:
Yes, most men are pedophiles under the legal definition.
No, most men are not pedophiles under the clinical defintion.

98% of men won't actually act or commit any sexual action towards minors or girls even though most of them find them sexually attractive and would in a fantasy world.
2% of men do act upon their true feelings and try to engage actitivities with girls under 18.


I'm curious to your numbers. What studies can you cite?

guest0929 wrote:And let's not forget, if a 12 year old boy has the hots for a 12 year old girl and he masterbates to her, and tries to physically and sexually pursue her, how is he also not a pedophile??


By definition he's not. He has to be over the age of sixteen before he can be a pedophile. In this scenario I'd assume he's strait rather than a pedophile, but one wouldn't know until he grew older or he told us himself. It took me a few years to sort out the feelings, but I knew I was a pedophile by the time I was thirteen. At that age, my peers and I were attracted to the same age group, however they were not pedophiles (to my knowledge), but merely strait/gay/bisexual/etc. I didn't get around, so I never learned how many people in my school had an interesting take on sexuality like me.

guest0929 wrote:So a 12 year old boy is old enough to be sexually attracted to a 12 year old girl, but all of a sudden an 18 year old guy is supposed to find 12 year old girls unattractive now?


Attraction can form in many different ways, but I'd argue that there is a reason that this generic twelve year old girl is found attractive. She's most likely started to develop secondary sex characteristics that we're told or programmed to like. In that case I see your point, but I wouldn't consider it pedophilia anymore and instead normal attraction (aka. Ephebophilia/Hebophilia).

guest0929 wrote:Like how does that work in the brain?

This isn't my area of expertise.

guest0929 wrote:What I'm saying is that he probably still finds her sexually attractive but now that he's 18, he WON'T act upon it and commit any action to getitng sexually involved with her because of the law.


If he found her physically attractive before, then had her cryogenically frozen until be turned 18, I agree that there's a chance he'll still find her attractive. I don't believe it is a given though. Our tastes and environments can change drastically.


But then again I find teens attractive but very rarely adults, so that could be wrong. It is sort of a sliding scale for me that drops off at adulthood. I see no reason to believe why that couldn't be possible for nonpedophiles in the opposite direction.
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Re: Aren't MOST men technically pedophiles?

Postby bipedal » Sat Dec 15, 2012 11:21 am

Anyone with a heart is hard wired to respond to young faces, youth, children, they remind us of early versions of us and are our future of our species. So were all attracted to children. We are also attracted to each other, were social creatures, work together make friends find mates.However there is a stronger drawing towards our young ones as they are in need of more protection, they're still learning and vulnerable.

Here's where it gets tricky; along the way some humans confuse their attraction towards children as sexual, there is no disease or mental affliction only confusion.

Many people throughout life including myself struggle with social protocol, were constantly being pressured and bashed to fit neatly in the society machine, all wanting to be accepted right? So for the greater cause you learn to bury your emotions bottle what you truly feel suppress what you truly are - in result you become something further from what you are, more artificial, decisions no longer come from a place of authenticity, perception becomes distorted and you become disconnected from what you really are at the core. Then something happens, the modified man sees a young girl, something so beautiful and pure an array of emotions go off something primal but what? through the midst of internal chaos and confusion the man grasps the only familiar emotion left, arousal, and believes it is arousing, therefore must be sexually attracted. So as society has taught the being 'you are what we say you are' it is convinced it is what is is, while knowing something isn't quite right in the back of their mind [the primal human that conjured up these emotions 'theres something more to this puzzle than what meets the eye']
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