I'm so glad you posted. I've been having the same type of obsession for the past 5 years or so. I am terrified of the number 4 and am always searching for the number 8. 48 is a good number because it ends with an 8, and i have this crazy notion (which i know is unfounded) that 84 is bad because it'll start off good (with an
and then it'll end terribly (4). Whatever good and terribly refer to depends on the current situation i'm in, for example if i'm thinking about relationships. I find myself constantly looking at the clock or around me (for example when a big rubber band lands on the ground and creates an
for these numbers. When I see the number 4, i feel a sense of dread and fear, when I see a number 8 am reassurred. This doesn't only apply to strictly these two numbers, if i look at the clock and it says for example 10:54, I feel scared and sad because i think the universe is trying to tell me that something bad is about to happen. It's gotten to the point where if I see 10:53 for example, it's bad because it's right before the number 4, but if I see 10:57 its good because it's closer to the number 8. I spend my days looking for these numbers, and my emotions are tormented because of them. I do feel sometimes that these numbers are out to get me. I'm really sick of fearing these numbers, and it seems that jasmin is pretty sure it's OCD, as well as you. Can I ask what type of treatments you have searched for? I've seen my therapist a few times, because apparently I am also borderline personality disorder. I don't know what to do, i feel like the number 4 and 8 have had detrimental effects on my potential romantic relationships. I see 8 as a good sign, saying that the relationship is going well, when I start seeing 4's more constantly, i start to freak out, and that plus my BPD has ruined so many potentially good relationships, mostly because i scare them off. I also obssses about crows and whether they fly from right to left or left to right. right to left is a good omen, left to right is a bad omen.
Is there anything else besides numbers that you watch out for?
Thanks again, and I hope that you reply. It would be really a comfort to speak with someone that knows both what I am going through and realizes that it's not a sign from the universe or whatever but that it's a problem that we need to get over.