Very long post, many may tl;dr
I am old enough to have adult children in college, am in a long term committed relationship, and have let 0% of the mess in my head trickle down on my kids. That being said, I was abused in 1st grade by my teacher and ever since puberty have endured the most horrible inner turmoil from the fantasies my abuse has spawned. It didn't help that I am a ...