Being seen as strong and problem free.

awakenow, if I don't answer the phone, I've got to think of an excuse - I can't always say I was out, and anyway, they know my routine. I never use my mobile phone, so that's okay. I don't always go out when they want me to, but I have to think of an excuse. I think it's because I'm female - men are probably a lot more honest in the way they speak to one another, whereas women seem to be constantly having their feelings hurt by other women.
The listening to problems thing was me viewing myself as all-knowing, and liking the sound of my own voice. The trouble is, people like someone who's prepared to listen and offer advice. I'd like a friend like that, probably. I've watched 'nons' when people unload to them, and I've noticed that they don't feel the need to offer advice necessarily - they just really listen, and sympathise.
My narcissism was/is more of the hidden sort, but I used to think that I was very intelligent, beautiful, superior, etc. etc.. Sometimes, I still feel that way, even though I'm in my 40s now, and I know about my narcissism.

You're in your 40s and you can't say 'no' to your friends? Sorry, I honestly thought you were a teenager.

If you're sure you're a narcissist, ok.