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Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

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Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby Brae » Sun Apr 15, 2012 8:39 pm

So a couple years ago, I realized I hate almost everyone, but mainly people I perceive as unintelligent, unmotivated, or unsuccessful. I have the ability to respect people and their accomplishments and I can feel sadness, Hell, I even cried when Rue died in The Hunger Games. But when relatives pass I don't feel sadness or any remorse, I can lie easily, I'm very easy to be angered, I'm very observant, I'm unwilling to accept criticism, I'm not that talkative, and I tend to get angry very easily. I don't even like my mother who raised me without my father because she is very unsuccessful, She's been divorced 4 times in 16 years, she's lazy, and somewhat unintelligent, I even earn more money than her. Yet I have some sort of admiration for my father and all he has accomplished with his own house, cars, successful marriage, etc. I earn everything myself and hate to ask others for handouts, I have the need to look good no matter where I'm going, even if it's just to the gas station. I'm not a very physically dominant person but mentally in every relationship (friends/family/other) I feel superior. I verbally dominate people, If they do something wrong I call them out on it, If they say i'm doing something wrong I ignore it and continue doing it my way.

It's taken me about 25 minutes to reflect on myself, what do you all think? Am I narcissistic?
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby lodi dodi » Sun Apr 15, 2012 11:11 pm

They do seem compensatory. What are your tribulations if you have any?
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby Viqq » Mon Apr 16, 2012 12:47 am

Brae wrote:So a couple years ago, I realized I hate almost everyone, but mainly people I perceive as unintelligent, unmotivated, or unsuccessful. I have the ability to respect people and their accomplishments and I can feel sadness, Hell, I even cried when Rue died in The Hunger Games. But when relatives pass I don't feel sadness or any remorse, I can lie easily, I'm very easy to be angered, I'm very observant, I'm unwilling to accept criticism, I'm not that talkative, and I tend to get angry very easily. I don't even like my mother who raised me without my father because she is very unsuccessful, She's been divorced 4 times in 16 years, she's lazy, and somewhat unintelligent, I even earn more money than her. Yet I have some sort of admiration for my father and all he has accomplished with his own house, cars, successful marriage, etc. I earn everything myself and hate to ask others for handouts, I have the need to look good no matter where I'm going, even if it's just to the gas station. I'm not a very physically dominant person but mentally in every relationship (friends/family/other) I feel superior. I verbally dominate people, If they do something wrong I call them out on it, If they say i'm doing something wrong I ignore it and continue doing it my way.

It's taken me about 25 minutes to reflect on myself, what do you all think? Am I narcissistic?

*Moves attention over to me* :p

I sort of liked the template of this thread, so thought I'd edit it to suit my personality better, and ask the same question.

I do hate almost everyone in online-games, and I almost don't love anyone in real life (that is: I appreciate and am emotionally happy about the support they have given me, and just for inviting me to their life/homes and so on, and I would like to return this favor - but that is basically it -- they haven't helped me to the level where I love them - often they may rather have damaged me equally much as having helped me out), including my family, when unintelligent (this is because unintelligent people, including some family members, are much poorer support; something I'm in great need of, and on the other hand might easily be destructive by their ignorance - stepping/walking before taking a proper look at what they're walking on). I guess hating online-gamers isn't quite the same as hating everyone though... When I think about it :wink:

I do hate unmotivated people by their degree of stagnation. If easily motivated, then we're cool, but the more stagnated the greater the hate - such people are destructive in their laziness; like a handicapped who has the opportunity to get his legs back simply by wishing them back, but refuses to so because he doesn't care about walking; destructive & willful ignorance.
Though I only hate them realistically speaking: because we live in a world where constructivity must be the foundation (which is the process humanity is currently/still struggling with) of the world. I don't deny their right to live in an ideal universe, but I do in this one (though I won't act much on this, except bringing this subject up philosophically, pending humanity's response to the matter).

I don't hate unsuccessful people - that's part of life, unless, as Einstein remarked, they "keep doing the same thing over and over again".

I could lie; or that is I'm capable of doing mostly anything that is usually restricted in others people's psyches, simply because I have a well stacked supply of hate - but I never do lie, or haven't done so in many years; I am rather very honest, and don't tell a lie unless I was threatened by my life.

I'm not easily angered, but perhaps somewhat easily annoyed, and easily angered in online-games.
I don't know what "being observant" entails. I guess I instantly detect people's "weaknesses", but superficially weaknesses; weakness of their behavior, or other weaknesses which I myself consider impersonal - which my hypothetical critique should have been considered constructive.

I accept criticism if it's constructive (i.e. what mostly any adult in real life would come forward with), but always ask most online-people when trying to criticize me to specify, as their critic is always very stereotypical, vague, and doesn't resonate properly with me - where they're thus usually unable to bring anything substantial forward.
I usually understand what they're trying to say, sometimes by their own ignorance, the problem is that I won't confirm this if/when they're unable or uninterested in accepting criticism themselves (90-95%+ of the time).

I don't like my mother 'cus she's been emotionally abusing me since at least age 5, lulz.

I might have the same problem of verbally dominating people. Or, more importantly from my POV, I deeply think that accurate communication is so important in general - all petty disputes, that is the majority of disputes, starts because of the inability to communicate accurately (vaguely defined words or/and word-trickery or word-confusion (word context-variation)), and specifically for me to avoid being misunderstood; misunderstanding being what every moron in the world does when confronted with a mind that brings up less-than-trivial subjects, unless this mind is already experienced in the art of dealing with a moron, either by having learned to simplify the subject of expertise, or by simplifying all less-than-trivial subjects (might seem arrogant as one is never expert in every field oneself), or by increasing the accuracy of the communication.

If someone says I'm doing it wrong I won't ignore it and carry on, I'll take it in, usually hurting my ego for a moment in the process, making me irritable, perhaps somewhat passive-aggressive, or just depressed/sad.

Now me-me-me-me ;D *steal has been successful* am I NPD? Image
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby svenska500 » Mon Apr 16, 2012 7:29 am

Brae wrote:So a couple years ago, I realized I hate almost everyone, but mainly people I perceive as unintelligent, unmotivated, or unsuccessful. I have the ability to respect people and their accomplishments and I can feel sadness, Hell, I even cried when Rue died in The Hunger Games. But when relatives pass I don't feel sadness or any remorse, I can lie easily, I'm very easy to be angered, I'm very observant, I'm unwilling to accept criticism, I'm not that talkative, and I tend to get angry very easily. I don't even like my mother who raised me without my father because she is very unsuccessful, She's been divorced 4 times in 16 years, she's lazy, and somewhat unintelligent, I even earn more money than her. Yet I have some sort of admiration for my father and all he has accomplished with his own house, cars, successful marriage, etc. I earn everything myself and hate to ask others for handouts, I have the need to look good no matter where I'm going, even if it's just to the gas station. I'm not a very physically dominant person but mentally in every relationship (friends/family/other) I feel superior. I verbally dominate people, If they do something wrong I call them out on it, If they say i'm doing something wrong I ignore it and continue doing it my way.

It's taken me about 25 minutes to reflect on myself, what do you all think? Am I narcissistic?


Those are many of my similar attributes and I was diagnosed with NPD. In fact, most are quite spot on. Do not see anything I disagree with.
Be extremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness. Be extremely mysterious, even to the point of soundlessness. Thereby you can be the director of the opponent's fate. - Sun Tzu
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby lodi dodi » Mon Apr 16, 2012 9:48 am

Viqq mind if I ask what your age is?
Well, you do think highly of yourself--you play video games but you're critical of others' lack of productiveness. You also think many are morons.
What are your tribulations if you have any?
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby Viqq » Mon Apr 16, 2012 11:15 am

lodi dodi wrote:Viqq mind if I ask what your age is?
Well, you do think highly of yourself--you play video games but you're critical of others' lack of productiveness. You also think many are morons.
What are your tribulations if you have any?

I'm 21. I wrote a post about my life yesterday - my first post on this forum, explaining that I moved out from an emotionally abusive mother 6 months ago (I guess they always are in NPD's lives :p) - scroll down for link.

Not of people's productiveness. I consider this total, "productiveness", as fluctuating throughout ones life, and to judge it at every moment at every level is judgmental (improper evaluation) and silly. What I am critical of is the theoretically existent "lazy" people that are; as put in the analogy; given the opportunity to get their legs back, but are content with being lazy - stagnated, refusing to ever change; to ever become productive - and this is just another way of leeching.
I play video games because my environment doesn't encourage much to any of my positive thinking. The town I live in is known as "the depression" of the region.
+ as my signature on a few game forums states, "Games should be a tool for enriching our lives and the world.
Instead people connect with games to disconnect from the world."
So I, unlike most other people, don't follow the POV that games is only lazy and unproductive. I consider games as simulations; bearing the potential of training various cognitive and mechanical skills.
Related video.
I also play games to socialize, as I don't have much of a pick in real life.

My tribulations are written about in the mentioned post, here.

I don't really mean to say or have the opinion that people are morons, I just think many acts like it.. The whole group-think-thing, basically savagery; all about territory and group conformity, most profoundly found in the jungle, and then amongst most/many "normal" people - I do think that $#%^ is "moronry"; the black/white thinking of "oh, this scientist wears a lab coat, therefor he must have authority on the subject - I should listen to him" to the exclusion of all others. This is the moron attitude, and it's frequent, and it's annoying as hell - it's counter-productive, it's individuality- & freedom-limiting, and it narrows all of learning down to stereotypes - which is not learning at all, it's copy & mimicking (related video) - essentially brainwashing.
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby lodi dodi » Mon Apr 16, 2012 1:03 pm

You have a particular theme going that stems from the ill-content of your upbringing (the things that are the focus of your contempts).

Your defense mechanism of choice is narcissism. I believe this is learned from your environment/nuture (mom's perfectionism) and also used in defense against it.

You haven't been completely consumed by it, though; you made/make efforts to be reasonable.
But if you further acquire negative baggage in the future, and depending on how bad they are, you might indulge further into narcissm/pathology.

You look down on people for their primitive/convenient behavior and you discount everything else that makes people, people (or you're unaware of them).
You sound isolated, and you chose this path or that's just how things transpired.
But because you're unable to or not have achieved fitting in/making friends, form solid relationships/connections, you justified it which consists putting yourself on a pedestal.

I think I missed why you're seeking insights into yourself, is it because you're having issues with your emotions?
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby Viqq » Mon Apr 16, 2012 2:36 pm

lodi dodi wrote:You have a particular theme going that stems from the ill-content of your upbringing (the things that are the focus of your contempts).

True story. Probably :mrgreen:

lodi dodi wrote:Your defense mechanism of choice is narcissism. I believe this is learned from your environment/nuture (mom's perfectionism) and also used in defense against it.

Sure, ok. The two last claims are definitely true, but I am still not sure it's Narcissism per say, more like something similar, or parts of it, but no need to split hairs.

lodi dodi wrote:You haven't been completely consumed by it, though; you made/make efforts to be reasonable.

Well, just to clarify: I think I've always been reasonable AFAIK - it didn't come after "the Narcissism".. My parents both have IQs of 130, mine is 125 (SD 15), and I was always interested in philosophy, mathematics, science++ - or most of all: Logic.. Learned to read by myself before starting school, and so on (I'm mostly self-taught English as well), and like most people in the computer profession self-taught that as well... And most people will disregard numerology and so fourth; and feel free to do so, but I also feel like throwing in that both me and my mom's got the '7' of numerology: Magic, logic and analysis. I'm not really (trying) to defend myself as much, or at all, as I am just sharing my experience - in case this might be relevant in some way.
And having a past/the recurrent theme of being misunderstood, I prefer to be elaborate or/and talk a lot to reduce the chance of misunderstanding (though more frequently judged as a 'weirdo' because of it + tranquilizing people)

lodi dodi wrote:But if you further acquire negative baggage in the future, and depending on how bad they are, you might indulge further into narcissm/pathology.

What do you think about the contrary, though? Or is what you're already saying here that because it isn't already pathological, then my behavior w.e can be restored/cured whatever?

lodi dodi wrote:You look down on people for their primitive/convenient behavior and you discount everything else that makes people, people (or you're unaware of them).

What makes people people? Or do you mean what makes people sheeple? Yeah I do "look down" on those :p - but behold ;p, not because they're different than me, but because they directly bother me with it - because they will go out on their witch hunts, or will condemn me, or violently reject me from their group just for my deviant opinions, not because of my behavior - I can be withdrawn, friendly and supportive.
Like the Atheists says, "we don't mind you being Christian as long as you won't mind us being Atheist". The problem I have with "utterly lazy people" or as I think you called it, "convenient behavior", is that they're wasting humanity/society's resources when someone else deserve it more: i.e. starving, dying children.
Anyway I don't emotionally have a grudge on these people - heck I'd love, and do love convenience and laziness, I only condemn this misplacement of resources (and this may also include lazy people's public display if it's arrogant or bothersome in this same respect).

lodi dodi wrote:You sound isolated, and you chose this path or that's just how things transpired.

Moving 11 times throughout childhood, frequently being misunderstood (because of history/emotional damage etc), almost always lacking/not meeting people with common interests, etc. I started isolating myself from age 14 or 15, sitting on the computer, until age 18, moving out to a youth home for a year, still sat much on the computer, then back home, now 21 and I still sit mostly or almost solely on the computer, but finally moved out: just finished buying backpacking gear, and I sometimes go out to play with juggling or whatever (I want to do much more, but as mentioned: this city is a depression - the only sports available is Soccer for teens and Basketball, most people are on welfare, are criminals, drug addicts, and so on... I thought of the city one day as 'a huge inferiority complex ' because the remaining "healthy" people always seem to be struck by an inferiority complex: arrogantly talking like they know everything, or they're the best at their field or whatever - but they aren't, there's almost no known people in this city, so it's all made up)

lodi dodi wrote:But because you're unable to or not have achieved fitting in/making friends, form solid relationships/connections, you justified it which consists putting yourself on a pedestal.

I don't know what 'solid relationships' mean or what the definition of that is, but I think I've had a few - basically meeting people with common interests, and we got along greatly.. the problem is that these kids moved. :p who'd figure.

lodi dodi wrote:I think I missed why you're seeking insights into yourself, is it because you're having issues with your emotions?

Uhm... There's a variety of reasons...
1. ALWAYS been interested. I also spent years (though spread out) from age 17-19 or so on trying to find out about psychological phenomenons resonating with me and my family/mother. And I was already trying to find out at age 14, but didn't have the means to do so. But at age 19 I got tired of it, and sort of decided that there's really nothing being accurate enough: I have a little of most of these diseases, and you can always exaggerate any of them to fit me, but none which fits in any way on the spot in an obvious/blatant way.

2. The reason I went back to having to care now was that I'll either have to start working soon, because I'm not diagnosed with anything (the psychologist who thought I had Narcissism, though obviously not testing me properly and barely knowing me, said that, "you fit all the criteria for the Narcissistic disorder, but I don't think this diagnosis would be constructive for you at the moment"), so I'm considered normal and healthy as far as the system is aware,
or I probably won't get any money at all.
And this isn't necessary an ultimatum, because I'm putting it simplified here, so I'm not _very_ worried that I won't get any more welfare, but this is certainly one of the reasons.

3. I'm still trying to find out whether there's something wrong with me or most others.
I.e. if I actually fall straightly under NPD, and that NPD is an actual science of pathologically destructive and manipulative people, or if what people try to categorize me as is like Borderline and Schizotypal has been frequently criticized for: just being catch-groups for any form of deviancy or troubles. The Wikipedia article tries to differentiate i.e. Astrology and Magical Thinking, but where do they really draw such lines.

Basically, as well known, many of the most important people in history has had some kind of disorder, and extreme opinions. And what I really want, and have always wanted to see, is the most clear signs that I'm pathological in contrast to important people in history - basically to see the most clear as possible way what forms of deviancy is unhealthy and why - or basically to be self-aware of whatever Demonic deviancy or disorder I have. Because of course, by the very definition, if no one is deviant then everyone are alike. How constructive can that be?
And indeed Psychology is still considered a pseudo-science in these aspects.

Thanks for input/feedback, and of course keep it coming/replying if you want to - I want you to :P

Edit: JUST REMEMBERED! I think the most dominant reason is that I had a small breakdown/meltdown whatever and raged - I forgot what the reason was, probably a game, and threw something not very hard at my TV, and the screen broke, so I smashed it completely up and threw it out. I almost don't give a $#%^ about the TV - I only watch downloaded movies or DVD or stuff like that on it anyway, the only emotions I had about it is that my aunts and 1 of their boyfriends helped out paying for it, so I felt pretty-, and still feel somewhat sad about that. So my reaction soon after was something like "$#%^ I gotta figure this anger $#%^ out so I don't do this stupid $#%^ again - this is unhealthy" - so a sort of "crisis", as I had another kind of meltdown the day after I think primarily or only because of the emotions about feeling bad about destroying the TV because of my aunts' support, and so I Googled a bit, found liveperson.com which offers 3 free minutes with a shrink xD, figured cool, why not, "got hooked" - finished the entire 20 min session, and so I've just started talking about my stuff/life with what I finally feel is a much more competent person: very good at asking engaging rather than stereotypical questions, being nice and sweet, ++.
Then pending a reply to my e-mail to this person, I decided to Google some more a couple days later - that is yesterday, or the day before that. Watched some more Borderline documentaries and so forth, as I believe my Mom is a BPD (with possibly some AsPD/NPD in there), and came here to read more about BPD/others stories, etc, and after 30 min lurking I got "impatient" and just wrote a thread about whether my mom might have BPD and I NPD.
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby lodi dodi » Tue Apr 17, 2012 1:40 am

Your self awareness where it comes to your defense mechanisms is not developed.

And having a past/the recurrent theme of being misunderstood, I prefer to be elaborate or/and talk a lot to reduce the chance of misunderstanding (though more frequently judged as a 'weirdo' because of it + tranquilizing people)


Your mom refused to understand you, everyone is not your mom, which is where the consequences were dire.

What do you think about the contrary, though? Or is what you're already saying here that because it isn't already pathological, then my behavior w.e can be restored/cured whatever?


IMO you're on the outskirts of youth, you're still in the learning phase and what you eventually do learn makes differences. I'd say your emotions+thoughts are setting you up for pathology.

What makes people people? Or do you mean what makes people sheeple? Yeah I do "look down" on those :p - but behold ;p, not because they're different than me, but because they directly bother me with it - because they will go out on their witch hunts, or will condemn me, or violently reject me from their group just for my deviant opinions, not because of my behavior - I can be withdrawn, friendly and supportive.


Because they condemned you to 2d, you in return see them the same.
If they thought of you differently, they'd reveal something different to you.
You want people to be tolerant, can you be tolerant of them?

Anyway I don't emotionally have a grudge on these people - heck I'd love, and do love convenience and laziness, I only condemn this misplacement of resources (and this may also include lazy people's public display if it's arrogant or bothersome in this same respect).


Take geography and you'll understand how the world is polarized/prioritized, don't take it out on the lemmings.
What city are you in?

I'm still trying to find out whether there's something wrong with me or most others.


That's your mom talking.

Basically, as well known, many of the most important people in history has had some kind of disorder, and extreme opinions. And what I really want, and have always wanted to see, is the most clear signs that I'm pathological in contrast to important people in history - basically to see the most clear as possible way what forms of deviancy is unhealthy and why - or basically to be self-aware of whatever Demonic deviancy or disorder I have. Because of course, by the very definition, if no one is deviant then everyone are alike. How constructive can that be?


Sure, but they had less than stellar lives. Intelligence accounts for about 5% of happiness/contentment from life, I read that from somewhere credible. You can be deviant and not compromise yourself.

I think the most dominant reason is that I had a small breakdown/meltdown whatever and raged - I forgot what the reason was, probably a game


Can you remember the reason? That's why you're here!
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Re: Why Do I Hate Everyone? Am I Narcissistic?

Postby svenska500 » Tue Apr 17, 2012 7:56 am

Viqq wrote:I'm 21. I wrote a post about my life yesterday - my first post on this forum, explaining that I moved out from an emotionally abusive mother 6 months ago (I guess they always are in NPD's lives :p) - scroll down for link.


Please do not take this the wrong way.. but it is clearly self-evident that you lack real-world social skills of any kind. Your attempt at trying to impress us with your vocabulary, IQ and other mundane topics are not interesting to anyone. This is why you are not attracting people in real-life to you.

If you are a narc, you should have countless people vying to be a part of your life. It appears you have nobody but an online world.

This is not meant as an insult, and you are only 21 so I should not expect much. Yet your 'delusions of grandeur' are a turn-off. They are boring and it appears you are putting up protective shields every step of the way, to ensure your fragile ego is not bruised. I have no interest in fully reading your posts, as they are repetitive babbling of veiled attempts at trying to compensate for your low self-esteem.

Please do not take this post offensively. Think about it. That's all. You have potential. Work on it buddy. From one narc to..
Be extremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness. Be extremely mysterious, even to the point of soundlessness. Thereby you can be the director of the opponent's fate. - Sun Tzu
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