Ego?

Are we inherently egotistical or is it a product of NPD supply? Take for instance people used to consistently kiss my ass because I was the life of the party. With that being said I've met 2 other narcissts and they were not legitmently cool people who thought they were somebody.

I think that it's the former, Maenad. I could liven things up, and make people laugh, so feeding my ego, but I had the inherent ego as a child, too, even when it wasn't doing me any favours.

I feel ego by definition is narcissistic, and everyone, except maybe those truly enlightened, has an ego. A non can maintain a balance between the true self and the ego. The ego of the non also wants to be praised, recognized, or validated, but his true self knows he would still be fine without all those supplies.

As I learned from Marg, a narc's ego is so powerful, or maybe more precisely, the true self is so immature and weak, the ego is given the job of the true self. Since the ego can not be validated by the true self from inside, it seeks it from outside to verify its very being. Unfortunately, external validation is not always available or satisfactory, hence the need for being arrogance or grandiose to cover it up.

Essentially egos are all fake and just illusions. I really think they are the same as that of a narc and a non. For example, I am a non and I like all the supplies. I just don't need them and don't go out of my way to seek them, and deep down I know they are really not that important.

I also think the true self is essentially the same for narcs and nons, except that it may be less developed / dormant for a narc.