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vengence

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vengence

Postby Maenad » Sun Dec 18, 2011 5:03 am

Why is that we tend to play god with other people, seek vengeance when wronged and try and teach other people lessons?
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Re: vengence

Postby JayEmCee » Sun Dec 18, 2011 12:54 pm

Because deep down in all of us there is a dark side. The side that that feels injustice or wrong doing and seeks out to correct it. I don’t think it’s a case of playing god, it’s more a case of seeking retribution for whatever it is that has caused us the pain or anguish. In an attempt to rid the conscience of whatever it is that is causing us that pain.

It’s human nature.

I defy anyone not to get stung by a wasp, and then immediately attempt to terminate the offence causing creature.

We all have a light loving side, a side that is benevolent and warm. And we all have a dark side, a side that is vengeful and full of rage. There has to be both in our lives, there has to be balance. Living with a pain or an injustice is hard, but you cannot always live in the light either. You have to know both sides of the picture before you can be a complete person.
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Re: vengence

Postby margharris » Mon Dec 19, 2011 7:12 am

Well you could tell yourself it was all about justice. Then again there is always that sniff of dominion when you hit the send on that email to the boss. Did you savour the moment of satisfaction before the pit of your stomach welcomed the incoming fear of retaliation?
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Re: vengence

Postby margharris » Tue Dec 20, 2011 10:21 pm

So really what is this vengeance for guys and more politely referred to as spite for the girls about.
Just my thoughts...

If your core understanding of life is that your very being depends on you being in control. What happens when someone over steps or does something to offend or gets that reward over you. Suddenly you are painfully aware that you aren't in control of everything. Life isn't penned by your scripts. Someone has made you feel something like anger or something like envy. For an N you haven't got the flexibility to redo your own position and accept you aren't in control. So your only response is to act to slam the offender. The power in that moment of revenge has you feeling satisfied. Your fear and anxiety of the failure of your core belief has been averted. It was necessary to maintain your inner balance.

Undoing that core belief and allowing life to control itself takes lots of courage. Taking that risk not to respond and recognizing the anxiety will pass is the step to take. You are in control of life when you realize you only need to control yourself.
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Re: vengence

Postby JayEmCee » Wed Dec 21, 2011 2:26 pm

Vengence is a terrible thing if you allow it to control you.

I’m my present situation I find my distain for my former partner growing ever more prevalent. In moments that I could only describe as feeling vengeful I have taken steps to protect my own interests and if necessary to hold an ace card. I hate the fact that I have taken those steps and I know that I would never use the information I hold to hurt her, because the end result would be that my children would be affected by the outcome. But still it is there.

There are moment when anger takes hold and a fear of what the future may hold also plays it’s part. In those moments I take action to protect myself which I suppose is a form of control. But, in the end I have learned that we never really have any control over where we are going on what we are going to do when we get there. Going with the flow and seeing what happens is a different way of living from how I have always lived but I figure it’s worth a try.

The acid test though will be when I feel comfortable with my life and delete the information that I hold as an emergency ace card. When I can do that then I will truly be able to say that I have vengeance thoughts in place towards my former partner.
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