Sorry to hear things I been going so poorly on your end. I know it must be really tough having social anxiety, as a friend of mine went through an INTENSE period of it for a few years after her father died. It was so bad, she couldn't even eat in restaurants--not even an ice cream parlor for fifteen or twenty minutes.
What you need to do is take it a little bit at a time, instead of trying to fix it all at once. For now, instead of taking courses AT a college, take online courses until you feel comfortable being in a classroom situation. Like Ravine said, become friends with your mom first, but then maybe even befriend other relatives until you feel comfortable trying to befriend other people outside of family members. Maybe even give a shot at going to webcam chatrooms, where you see the people, but for now don't have to be physically near them until you are ready.
As far as a job goes, maybe you should try getting a desk job--something in a cubicle where your contact with people will be at a minimum. A job at a store or something will be too much at once for sure, so just start off small.
I know how bad it is when you feel you have no control over your life with an illness like this. I do not have social anxiety, but I have OCPD and it can affect my life pretty badly as well. But let me give you some advice my mom gave me: one day at a time. Don't try to fix everything at once. Don't try and look towards the future on HOW to fix your problem. You cannot fix the past. And you cannot control the future. All you can do is get through TODAY. So try that, okay? And hey, if you just need a friend to talk to, I'd be glad to give you an instant messenger of mine or a cell phone number to text.
You've got people here on the forums willing to help you through.