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Completely overwhelmed & confused

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Completely overwhelmed & confused

Postby dem » Tue Jun 13, 2017 8:11 pm

Hello. I have no idea where to go, I have nobody to talk to, so here I am. For several years now, I've been living with anxiety (panic attacks, choking fear, social issues, low self esteem...) I'm turning 18 in a couple of months and have tried to reach out to my mother twice (2015,2016) but it didn't help. She thought I was going through the normal teenage phase. Growing up. Even though she knows that I have panic attacks (used to have them daily, or actually nightly. couldn't sleep at all.) and even if the panic attacks have lessened, I still feel I'm getting worse. I do not harm myself physically anymore. But I can't. I just can't cope with anything right now. I feel i'm going crazy. Sleeping too much or not enough. I feel scared for no reason, am starting to... see and hear things (guitar in my brother's bedroom when he is Not here, and it terrifies me/ i see people running and when i look again there's nothing, and that scares me too.) I experience depersonalization/derealization on a daily basis it's getting out of hand. I don't know who I am, what i am, my body feels disconnected from my head and my limbs feel either insanely huge or insanely small. I dont know what to do. I can't take this. I'm scared I might cross the line between sanity and insanity.
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Re: Completely overwhelmed & confused

Postby Alucard » Wed Jun 14, 2017 2:31 am

Hi.

Welcome.

You've been struggling a lot. Those feelings have to be extremely overwhelming for you, and I only say that because I was the same at 18. At 22, I still experience many different aspects of the human condition, including panic attacks--I was at the E.R a few days ago for one in fact. My panic attacks usually consist of a high resting heart rate (about 170, on average), the fear that I'm going to die, that I've lost control, a tingling sensation in all of my limbs, hyperventilation, and if it's not intervened with, I will pass out. So I go to the E.R just in case I pass out, and because it's difficult to get things back under control.

I have hallucinations, particularly when I'm very stressed or overloaded sensory wise. Paranoia gets me, what some people called delusions, e.t.c, e.t.c. So I experience reality a little different than most, and that's okay. I don't ever see a line between sanity and insanity, personally, because both experiences are valid. I think they're one in the same, for that reason.

But---that doesn't mean I too wasn't at one point extremely afraid of tipping into that insanity, of losing control, "going psychotic", whatever you want to call it.

I think it's good to point out that you're reaching out here, and that's huge. You have a lot of experiences that are distressing and that worry you, and that is hard to sit with, you know? You just want it to stop so you feel you can function better. You've survived thus far, you've handled it this far, you can continue, but maybe with support, with community. There are resources out there for you, including this forum if you feel feedback in this format is helpful. I've personally found a lot of peace medication free, community engaged. But that's my story, and my choices. You have choices too, and a chance to build your own story.

Wish you well.
I like living in the world in my head because I'm in charge half the time.

https://mentaltruths.wordpress.com/
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Re: Completely overwhelmed & confused

Postby wsucougar » Wed Jun 14, 2017 4:41 pm

Hi
I have felt much the same as you. I found a free source, it should help you. Go to You Tube. Type in Glenn Harrold . He is a legit hypnotherapist in the UK. He has several audio recordings that people have downloaded to you tube. He is also in the Google Play store, which is where I found his works.
Anyway, on you tube , he has about 30 audio recordings, anxiety, self eteem, think positive , etc. my spelling is horrible, thanks to all my brain injuries, and learning disabilities.
Some of the audio recordings have a sleep ending, some have an awake ending. He talks about trance, but I never went into a trance, but I did and do get a lot of benefit from these recordings. I try to listen to them everyday, and with my brain injuries, and lots of memory loss, everyday is good for me. For you, a few times a week, maybe :} . Some are relaxing, some are helpful, like working thru your phobias, or losing weight, or help stop smoking. The anxiety with sleep ending, gave me ways to deal with some anxiety, and to sleep, and lots of positive suggestions for my life. Every one should try this, even if only you need to relax and feel good about yourselves. 8)

But until I found these audio recordings, I had a hard time dealing with life.. The guy is even in WIKIPEDIA , if you want to read about him.
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