Looking for help and so far receiving nothing but misunderstanding, dismissal, indifference, and worse? Precious, that's brutal. We won't be able to take care of you in the way you're asking for, but what we can offer is perspective, encouragement, information, and the like. We can tell you you're not alone. We can tell you others have been there, survived, have been glad with their decision to not end their own lives. We can tell you it's going to be hard but, more importantly, that it can be done. We can tell you that this big gaping beast of a problem who is currently haunting your life isn't so big or gaping. Instead, it's really made up of a bunch of smaller problems which can be addressed over time.
In some ways, you're at war with both some of those around you and, perhaps most sadly, also yourself. To begin a process toward resolving this war, you need only start by working on a single battle. For you, this battle might be approached with something like this: acknowledging the problems but also where you want to end up. This can be done by reminding yourself of a simple truth "I don't want to live like this, but I do want to live!"
From here, all those internal debates about what to do and how to do it can change. All those wonderful problem-solving mechanisms within your mind can then focus less and less on suicide as an answer and more on chipping away at these numerous problems, like perhaps finding a new job and more supportive environments (hopefully we'll help with this one). Most days still may not feel good in the foreseeable future, but they can be made to feel less and less worse - they can be made to feel better and better! To begin, you can start with the truth: "I don't want to live like this, but I do want to live!"