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Living with a paranoid person

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Living with a paranoid person

Postby HELPNEEDED » Mon Apr 17, 2006 1:12 pm

I just wanted to see how others deal with living with a paranoid person. My husband has been for years paranoid a little, now it is full blown. Nothing I say or do helps. He is seeing a phycologist, but it doesn't seem to be helping. The therapist will not give me any information as to how the sessions are going and my husband seems to be getting worse. I don't know what to do anymore. I am now the target, along with all our families and friends, of the paranoia. Any suggestions?


Postby sweetngentle » Mon Apr 17, 2006 6:29 pm

I too live with a paranoid person. Sometimes I want to shake this person and tell them not to do it again. But I know that paranoia he does his best to control it. Usually when he or I can see the prarnoia happening he will talk to me about it and then he seems to let it go.

This is just what has worked out well for us. There are many other possible solutions.

Blessed are those
who can give without
remembering, and take
without forgetting.
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Living with a paranoid person

Postby HELPNEEDED » Tue Apr 18, 2006 3:17 pm

Thanks for responding, he thinks that everyone, me, my family, his family, all his customers, and freinds are out to "set him up" for arrest or kill him. He thinks that his family has theatened him and that his friends and customer want to have him arrested for things from doing work with out a permit ( he is a plumber) to turning him into the IRS. He thinks that my family wants to have him arrested for molesting childern, which never happened. And with me, he thinks that I am providing all the information about him to these people. Some days are good and some bad. When he starts telling me that he "knows" where the source is, I know that it will be a bad few days. Last time, I just lost it and flat out told him that he was sick and that nothing he said made sense or that none of the accusations were true. So if you can make any suggestions, I am open.

yep, been there, done that.

Postby guest » Sun Apr 23, 2006 2:09 am

Hi, I sympathize with you. It sounds like he's got delusional disorder, paranoid type. I hear the same things from my love. He "knows" I am telling "all his business" to the dark forces who are working "behind the scenes" to kill and or destroy his life.

This week he asked me to go to a pay phone to talk about the delusional plan of destruction because all the phones are bugged including the cell phones.

Then he accused me of sending someone to kill him at the pay phone after we hung up. The man in black reportedly ran up to him at the pay phone and said "Now you will be dealt with".

Since then, he's been running around like a crazy person hiding out. He won't tell me where he is because I am the one "feeding them information" about his every move, and every conversation.
He says his life is in danger, and that I am to blame.

He has delusional disorder, mixed type (Paranoid and Jealous combination). That's a hell of a combo. I wish it was one or the other. Having mixed type is awful.

There is never any relief.

it's hell.

thank you

Postby eflores » Thu May 04, 2006 9:16 pm

Finally someone who has it a little bit worse than me ( for now ). Actually, it has a few weeks since I check this and for the last few weeks things are going okay. He hasn't accused me of late and hasn't talked with me about those out to get him. I know that it is still in his head. I am bracing for the next full moon and when my cycle is here ( next few days ) it seems to get worse at these times. We will just have to see. At least your loved one is out of the house most of the time. Mine is always at home and when he goes out says that there are people following him. He too doesn't want to take on the phone at home unless it is on the speaker. It is very tiring.

living with a paranoid spouse

Postby summertimegirl » Wed May 10, 2006 12:12 am

Hi I am new here. I have been living with this for almost 6 years. My husband has progressed to the point now that we can no longer have a conversation with him, he has quit his job (that one hurts, we have 2 kids in college right now) and we can't associate with anyone or bring anyone to the house. Our daughters don't bring their bf's or any friends to the house because they are afraid of what he will say or do. He has written letters to the white house, the newspapers, etc. he believes that he has a bug his tooth th at is connected to a camera in his eye so he walks around sometimes with tape over his eye, he also believes there is something in his ear, his knee and at various times in other body parts. He believes that everyone in the country is involved, including me, will wake me up at night screaming about my involvement, asking who I am giving the information to, do I know when it will end, etc. He is making me nuts!. The problem is that when you have loved someone for 27 years and know that they are sick, it is very hard to turn your back on them, especially when you are afraid of what will happen to them if they are alone. I am so afraid that if he loses me that he will hurt himself because he constantly says that the only thing keeping him together is me. This is of course when he is not accusing me. The other thing is that when he has these screaming episodes, I swear that he does not remember what he says and does. It is very hard and very frustrating. He refuses the look for another job because he says that the voices in his head told him that the spies will not allow him to get another one.

It is helpful sometimes to know that you are not alone, even though it is horrible to think that another person is living the same thing. But when you are living with this, you just feel so alone and isolated it is a very miserable life.

Sorry to vent, had to get it out, You just can't really talk about it a lot you know what I mean. The other frustrating thing is that they can appear perfectly normal to other people so you seem like the crazy person.
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Postby 112657 » Sun May 14, 2006 4:21 am

Wow. It felt both good and really bad reading your posts. I have been feeling so alone! I am involved with someone who has PPD, and it has become a nightmare. Right now my situation with her has escalated to a ridiculous (and sometimes scary) point. It's a long, long story, and I doubt that mine is vastly different than all of yours.

She teaches at my school, and she has used the school's police and judicial systems to attack me and prove to everyone that I am some sort of threat to her. And it's true, most people think that I am the crazy one (though recently that is finally begininng to change) when I try to make them understand what she has. I am at a crossroads. So many people tell me that if I cared I'd walk away and forget about her. They don't understand and think it is just some weird thing between me and her. They think if I went away, she'd magically get better, even though there have been ongoing problems at her job for years!

It kills me that they try to make ME feel guilty! They just want the problem to go away and aren't really looking at options that may help her. And I love her, and feel like though I know I need to protect myself, I can't just abandon her until I feel like I have done everything I can.

So, now I have to make a choice. Am I making it worse? Or, should I take a risk for her and escalate the situation more and more until she reacts badly enough that the school's administration hopefully mandate counseling?

I'm so torn. Anyone have any thoughts?
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Postby lonley fading » Mon May 15, 2006 12:59 am

I am a paranoid person, and it sucks

Anyway things for you to do:

Open communications know what he thinks, and feels, and why all the time. If he looks upset, or starting to get in that mind frame, get him to talk about it.

2nd. rigerous exersice schedual - if possible, working out is natural and it releases endorphines and seratonin into your body making you literally feel better. Not to mention look better, and gives yourself a sense of accomplishment

3rd. hang in and do what you can

Ive talked to some other people married/seeing ppd's in the paranoir personality disorder section it all is pretty much the same if you want to pop over there.
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