Our partner

Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Histrionic Personality Disorder message board, open discussion, and online support group.

Moderators: masquerade, xdude, orion13213

Forum rules
Attention Please. You are entering the Histrionic Personality Disorder forum. Please read this carefully.

Given the unique propensities of those who are faced with the issues of HPD, topics at times may be uncomfortable for non HP readers. Discussions related to HPD behavior are permitted here, within the context of deeper understanding of the commonalties shared by members. Indulging or encouraging these urges is not what this forum is intended for.

Conversations here can be triggering for those who have suffered abuse from HPDs. .
Non HPD users are welcome to post here, But their questions Must have a respectful tone.
If you are a NON and have issues with an past relationship with an HPD person, it is suggested that you Post in a Relationship forum. Here is a link to that forum: relationship/

For those who have no respect for either this illness or for those who are living with it, please do not enter this forum. Discrimination of Personality Disorders is not tolerated on this site.

Moderators are present here to ensure that members treat each other with dignity and respect. If topics become overly graphic or drift from having a healthy perspective, moderators will intervene.
Please feel free to contact a moderator if you have any questions or concerns.

Best Regards,
The Team

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby nosnam » Sun May 15, 2011 10:13 pm

My HPD friend has suffered from bulimia since the age of 12 (she is now 17). I have reason to believe that it is true since she has lived in the hospital for months at a time... but I also know for a fact that she uses it to reel people in.

Do you guys think it might be exagerated in order to get attention?

And are eating disorders common with HPD's?
nosnam
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Mar 04, 2011 12:29 am
Local time: Fri Oct 31, 2014 8:38 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)


ADVERTISEMENT

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby Jay Mack » Mon May 16, 2011 4:52 pm

I'm wondering if santa fe dated my HP before or after me!

I personally witnessed serious falls to the ground and falling objects on her body that would have debilitated an average person, as well as cuts from slicing vegetables or opening boxes that the average person would have sought stitches for in an ER. Yet, she simply shrugged it off and bounced back never mentioning it.

It was the internal "ailments" she spoke of daily; aching elbows, hips and other joints, stabbing pains in her head, all kinds of symptons for which a healing progression couldn't be observed. In desperation for attention, she sought a medical diagnosis for rheumatoid arthritis and not finding that she finally found a Dr. diagnosing fibromyalgia, the grandaddy of all afflictions.

The disclosure was absolutely the most dramatic display I'd ever witnessed. It was constant crying and whining about fibro day in and day out, "are you going to take care of me when I'm crippled", you're going to have to be gentle with me", "I'm not sure how long I can work" (she was 44), but the fibro diagnosis certainly didn't affect her four or five week long, yearly vacations across the country or to the Caribbean, or from driving across the country. Funny though, as she started the devaluation which continued over six months not a word was ever mentioned.

I'm certain she didn't disclose the "diagnosis" to the N she was seducing the last four months we dated, she's probably saving it for when she feels his attention is declining. Thank heaven's she's somebody else's problem now.
Jay Mack
Jay Mack
Consumer 5
Consumer 5
 
Posts: 126
Joined: Wed Sep 05, 2007 3:25 am
Local time: Sat Nov 01, 2014 5:38 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby nowheregirl » Mon May 16, 2011 5:48 pm

I think sometimes they might have a psychosomatic illness and maybe the illness isn't real but their suffering is.

I did feign sickness when I was a child to get out of school, but I knew why I was doing it. It was to avoid something like a quiz or test or person(s). Or sometimes I felt sort of sick but not sick enough to probably stay home but I would convince myself that I was and I would start to feel like I was-maybe that's what it's like for them.

i wouldn't discount that someone is truly sick though because there are lots of illnesses that are hard to diagnose. I know when I feel bad, I will go on the internet and be like a pit bull and voraciously try to figure out what is wrong with me and then go to the doctor with my findings. I think eliminating the possibility that you don't have the illness you think you might have is a good thing because then you can have peace of mind that that's not what is wrong with you and check for other things and maybe be able to alleviate some of the symptons or get a cure out of it.

I don't think it's good to just pass it off and say it's imaginary. Even if it is somatic, that's something that can be worked toward resloving psychologically.
All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up

"My non response to Johnny Mac should not be construed as acceptance of his position. It is recognition that he chums."
User avatar
nowheregirl
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 393
Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2010 7:34 pm
Local time: Fri Oct 31, 2014 8:38 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby Jay Mack » Tue May 17, 2011 1:55 am

nosnam wrote:And are eating disorders common with HPD's?


My ex certainly had them. Not buliemia or anorexia (sp) but dieting. Over the nine years, she frequently went on all the fad diets losing 10-12 pounds each time only to put it back on within 6 months. The Adkins diet caused the greatest swings in her personality due to carb deficiency. It seemed to me that the diets she espoused were simply more talking points about herself.

And yes, the illnesses were used for attention, but only from the regular guy, and then to ensure sympathy for continuing the relationship. I don't think she discussed her ailments to the fan club, because, what guy seducing a girl would want to follow through if she were sickly?
Jay Mack
Jay Mack
Consumer 5
Consumer 5
 
Posts: 126
Joined: Wed Sep 05, 2007 3:25 am
Local time: Sat Nov 01, 2014 5:38 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby ghost5of7 » Thu Jul 07, 2011 7:37 pm

Mine faked pregnancy tests a fair number of times. Concocted a "rape" hoax along with cosmetic 'bruises', went to the ER for pretty silly reasons (ie:cramps, heavy flow menstruation).. and would fake miscarriages. (Most of these I learned about after the fact.) It's attention seeking behavior, as well as emotional manipulation.

For example:
The "rape" hoax was concocted as she "was looking for my truck to beg forgiveness". Basically she wanted me to feel bad for dumping her.

The faked pregnancy tests were an attention ploy, and meant to try and keep me on her hook, ot hurt me for refusing to have anything to do with her.

The faked miscarriages.. a double bonus. Attentionn and sympathy... as well as a convenient cover for the lack of a baby...

:-) There is a condition called "munchausen syndrome" where people are compellef to fake illnesses for the sympathy attention thatt the treatment draws.. HPD's will pull similar stuff for different motivations.
ghost5of7
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 508
Joined: Tue Sep 29, 2009 6:19 am
Local time: Fri Oct 31, 2014 8:38 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby Wonderer7 » Thu Jul 07, 2011 7:49 pm

I don't think all are faked, they might be conversion disorders or other somatic illness.
Wonderer7
Consumer 4
Consumer 4
 
Posts: 92
Joined: Wed Jun 22, 2011 6:49 pm
Local time: Sat Nov 01, 2014 4:38 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby Savedbymyself » Thu Jul 07, 2011 9:03 pm

My ex faked a lot of illness. She'd always feel sick when she was over at my house or just before we hung out and maybe she had other plans she'd want to do she would call and cancel saying she was sick. When she was over at my house she would just lay down on a couch or my bed and just put her face into and not say much until I gave her enough attention. Typically though this is one of the two main forms of a HPD tantrum. Usually when they don't want to do something they were about to have to do or if you aren't giving them enough attention they will feel sick for attention. Since HPDs don't know how to directly express negative feelings to you they bottle them up and when they do that their mind actually makes them feel pain. I do think the pain feels real to them no doubt, but the origin of my exHPDs pain always seemed to be psychological.
Savedbymyself
Consumer 4
Consumer 4
 
Posts: 94
Joined: Thu Jun 16, 2011 9:15 am
Local time: Fri Oct 31, 2014 9:38 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby feelduped » Sat Sep 03, 2011 11:19 pm

Great thread. I have a friend who exhibits HPD tendencies. Currently, she is supposedly in NYC getting a bone marrow transplant for late stage cancer. She is communicating with me by text, but sometimes incoherent. I suspect she is faking as I have asked repeatedly which hospital she is in and each time she dodges the question. Over the last three years there have been so many incredible events that I am left with no other conclusion than HPD. To summarize, there has been: divorce, institutionalized ex, escaped ex, mugging, emergency travel to russia, rape while in russia, b-level celebrity friend who rescues when I do not, and more. The cancer is the latest. I cut off contact for months, but she wooed me back. What do I do?
feelduped
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Sep 03, 2011 11:03 pm
Local time: Fri Oct 31, 2014 11:38 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Survey: experiences with faking / pretending illness

Postby george78 » Sun Sep 04, 2011 1:51 pm

feelduped wrote:Great thread. I have a friend who exhibits HPD tendencies. Currently, she is supposedly in NYC getting a bone marrow transplant for late stage cancer. She is communicating with me by text, but sometimes incoherent. I suspect she is faking as I have asked repeatedly which hospital she is in and each time she dodges the question. Over the last three years there have been so many incredible events that I am left with no other conclusion than HPD. To summarize, there has been: divorce, institutionalized ex, escaped ex, mugging, emergency travel to russia, rape while in russia, b-level celebrity friend who rescues when I do not, and more. The cancer is the latest. I cut off contact for months, but she wooed me back. What do I do?


I'd say (when you are not able to stay without contact), detach emotionally. Don't depend on her. Don't make important agreements with her. Think of a little child of 3 years. Everything he says one has to take with a grain of salt. And you don't get too exited when a child tells you that he saw the tooth fairy.

For which of these event do you have any hard evidence that they indeed happened besides her account? For example did you get her to the airport? Does she look weakened from late stage cancer? The HPD person in my life claimed to have cancer, showed not the slightest signs of reduced fitness and everything I know about her 'illness' stems from her account. But she contradicted herself and behaved not like someone who is genuine.
george78
Consumer 5
Consumer 5
 
Posts: 153
Joined: Fri May 06, 2011 5:35 pm
Local time: Sat Nov 01, 2014 4:38 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Mine

Postby Jaydon Rich » Sun Sep 04, 2011 2:26 pm

I used to cut myself then act when people asked what they were. "Oh... I walked into a door." Without eye contact, withdrawn and 'absent mindedly' touching them. I tried bruising my face, but it didn't give me the same rush when I did it. It was sharper, more of a surge, cutting makes the world feel clearer and more drawn out. It also makes me feel sleepy quicker then hitting myself, which makes me hyper aware then drowsy after an hour or so. I do those for the attention and the actual physiological effect, I've stopped but I do miss that rush sometimes.

When I was younger I used to fake sick contantly. I played up any real sickness, and convinced myself sick. When I was a teenager I stopped eating so people would think I had something wrong with me. I also stopped talking for half a day, so that people would think something bad had happened to me.

I also act helpless when I'm drunk. As in, I act like I can't do basic things even though I can.

Basically I play the victim.
Hop up on my bed get my swag on, let them hater's keep on hating I do what I want, Cause I ain't doin nothin wrong, Just tryna have fun and keep this party jumpin, So what's up? Yeeeaaaaah :)
Jaydon Rich
Consumer 2
Consumer 2
 
Posts: 47
Joined: Tue Aug 16, 2011 1:22 pm
Local time: Sat Nov 01, 2014 12:38 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

PreviousNext

Return to Histrionic Personality Disorder Forum




  • Related articles
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 71 guests

cron