treetop wrote:to play devil's advocate, earth, I'll suggest this girl isn't disordered and you're just projecting some of the traumas of your past relationship into this new one.
from a girl's point of view I'll tell you, you may not think a relationship is there but perhaps she does, and as such, she's angry when you want to leave it. she may think there is a relationship because you show mutual caring for one another, she's shared intimate conversation with you, and you are probably around each other a lot and she perhaps has deeper feelings for you. I think that in a girl's mind, sexual intimacy isn't the only marker of a 'relationship', sharing intimate conversation/space is a 'relationship' as well. in addition, if stories of her past trauma is true, she may have some left-over abandonment fears - which is why she raged at the thought of you abandoning her- she was scared of it happening.
perhaps she is telling you a lot about herself because she wants to establish intimacy. if she listens when you begin talking about yourself as well, that means she is truly interested. perhaps she is trying to get you to open up.
because of your past bad relationship you may be prone to thinking that history is repeating itself even if it isn't.
on the flip side- you two did move in together fairly soon without knowing much about each other, and that could spell trouble. if she is disordered, and you are picking up on true red flags, then I would question why you moved in with a relative stranger and set yourself up for this situation all over again. good luck to you in sorting it all out!
Cincy_81 wrote:I don't think this is unusual at all, unfortunately. (I have my Armchair Psychology Degree from the University of Google! )
Really, though, this is a tale as old as time, people running from one relationship into another that's just like it. Abused women running to another abuser, codependents running to another addict, etc. Maybe you are projecting but it's also highly likely that yes, you fall into these relationships for a reason.
Users browsing this forum: Hadley739 and 72 guests