Hi, I'm not sure where to start with this but here goes nothing.
For the past 18 months or so I've felt a change. The only way I can explain it is it's like living in a pressure cooker. I feel very anxious and irritated for no apparent reason. Everything just frustrates me to the point that I've had meltdowns in front of people at work and my family. I just feel as if I'm under this enormous pressure and everything stresses me out. It's gotten to the point where I don't want to do anything. I still do the normal things that have been in my routine for a while (church, work, school) but I don't do anything else. I just can't do anything without getting frustrated.
A family member suggested that I should just get over it and get out of the house. I tried going out with some friends and almost felt as if I was going to have a panic attack. My heart just started racing and my thoughts were all over the place so after 5 minutes, I left and went home. The only thing that I find works is music or white noise. So I've gotten into the habit of having my earbuds in with music or white noise playing when I go out to run errands.
I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm sick of feeling trapped and unable to have fun. I have no idea where these feelings have come from. My mother was bipolar and I was verbally abused as a teen. I'm not sure if that could be the reason for all this or not.
Is this something that could be helped by seeing a therapist? Any suggestions are greatly appreciated. Thanks.