You know my feelings on this. But just to let you know, in the 9 months since I left, I haven't felt lonely at all. Just relieved. My kids really rallied, they knew, and they have been there for me in ways that make me very proud to be their parent. Even my in-laws have been supportive. I don't call it being alone, or being lonely, I just really enjoy my solitude, my every minute deciding what I want to do, without taking crazy into account. I'm still in the midst of the mess, haven't gotten the divorce final, still get calls from my husband at work over one dumb thing or the other (latest is he wants copies of our wedding pictures, to which I want to reply, "F*(#*&-off", but instead I say, "what? I can't hear you. Darn cell phones...").
Imagine, time to read, time to watch a TV show uninterrupted, a quiet house. Rent a copy of Shirley Valentine. And the grandkid - geez, I have this beautiful grandson - he'll be 3 this week. The day he was born my husband couldn't even hug me he was so distraught at my whorish behavior. But now I see the little guy weekly - my husband hasn't seen him in 5 months and doesn't even care. You have your daughters, a granddaughter, a job, a full life. It will be better ("can't get much worse...."). And if you ever make it to North California, I'll take you to the wineries & the redwoods and we can have a good laugh at how there was a time when we both thought we'd never laugh again.