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Parent with Delusional Jealousy?

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Parent with Delusional Jealousy?

Postby H-Black » Thu May 29, 2014 11:55 pm

Hi.

I've bee reading some post about DDJ, specially the ones with Jealousy as a subtype.

I think my father posibly have this. I don't remember how things were when I was a kid, since I don't have lots of memories of my childhood, but since I'm a adolescent, I was somehow involved in this problem.

Father is very jealous, and sometimes he has some eras when he's extremely jealous and thinks mother is unfaithful to him with lots and lots of men. He seems so sure about it that sometimes made me doubt about mother (not that I believed she cheated on him multiple times, but I thought that maybe she did it once and now he sees everything like that, but that was past). Of course I never said anything like that to mother, because there was just a thought and I have no evidence, so I was like "innocent until proven guilty".

Because of this (I guess), I was the "lawyer" of both of them. Father would tell me the things he thinks, mother would complain how father said nasty things to her and I'd to talk to both to soothe the things or to put in some logical thinking.

There were lots of times with fights, some of them pretty bigs, and I was worried about my little sister, because she had seen some of them and then feel very bad. I also have a older brother (is actually a half-brother, but that doesn't change anything for us, maybe for father is a different thing, I don´t know, sometimes it looks like he's more harsh to him that to the rest of us, but sometimes he has a reason to be like that, so I'm not sure), who doesn't talk about their fights or anything about it, sometimes just make jokes about how jealous and paranoid he is (when he isn't, of course, but still think that isn't a nice thing to do, but makes mother laugh a little, so I don't know. :/ )

Anyway... I was studying psychology, and at first I thought maybe he was schizophrenic (and since I thought I could understand my father, I thought maybe I was the same), because some of things could apply to him, but there was something that didn't fit, so I wasn't that sure. In those years happened one of his "totally jealous" eras, and was very difficult time for everyone, but I guess were more difficult to mother and father.

Now they're good, but even so we already know it's just matter of time to be in one of his eras again.

We tried to convince him to go to a psychologyst an he went a couple of times, with mother, but he was certain that, the one with troubles were mother and not him. Mother loves him very much and she didn't want to divorce him even in the awful times they went. I know that father loves her dearly too, but he seems to think she's gonna left him anytime because he's older than her, and looks like he has the idea of "I would leave her first if she tries too", or something like that.

Any of you know a way to help him? But in a way he could accept it? Because we tried before and the results weren't good.

Furthermore, we know that he, in his twenties, went to a psychiatric hospital and took medicine, but he said it was nothing and won't talk more about it.

Any help you could say, we'll be thankful.
Dx: Asperger's and PTSD.

English isn't my native language. Let me know if I did any mistake so I could learn from it.

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