by mental_health_needed » Fri Feb 14, 2014 2:08 am
My parents found out when my dad was snooping through my Facebook messages because he and my mother have never approved of about 50% of the things I do, even though I don't drink, smoke, do drugs or sleep around and I have a 3.5 in school. They found out about the SH and a lot of other things. For about 3 weeks, they acted like that part of my messages to my friend didn't exist, and I thought they would ignore it.
Three days later, they demanded to see the cuts, so I showed them the less serious ones on my thighs, and they freaked out. My dad was mad at first, and my mom started trying to guilt me by crying and moaning and saying it was all her fault, the same way she has with everything my whole life. They tried to send me to a therapist, but the therapist was cruel and basically said I was being a drama queen and an attention whore. My parents Didn't entirely believe me, but they made me go back. Later, my mom guilted me into showing her my arms, which were much worse.
Now, my mom can't look at me without crying or pretending too. The worst part is my dad (who I was very close to back before my parents thought I was a freak) is now super obvious about it, to the point where one of my two younger sisters has caught on. It's killing me. My sisters are my whole life, and used to look up to me. Now, the older of the two looks disappointed and like she's going to cry every time she sees me, but she never mentions it, out of shame. My youngest sister just knows I've been sad for a long time, and constantly hugs and kisses me to try and make it better, but even she has a hard time being around me, because of everybody else's blatant shame. My sisters are my whole world, and now it's like they're gone, and I just want to cut constantly, And to top it all off, my dad won't let me be by myself most of the time, because he thinks I constantly cut myself and have no self control. I just want it all to stop.