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Why did I chose this type of self harm?

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Why did I chose this type of self harm?

Postby JeanieGurl » Sun Jan 01, 2017 8:24 am

I was wondering if anyone had thought through the different methods of self harm before choosing one, then doing it?

I am 40 yrs old, a mother and married for a long time. I only started actively self harming 2 years ago. I don't cut and believe I will probably never cut. But the methods I have chosen have left me with long term health issues.

I am just confused as to why it started and why I chose these 2 methods and why I did such a 'great job' at them.
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Re: Why did I chose this type of self harm?

Postby Snaga » Sun Jan 01, 2017 4:04 pm

That's a good question.

Maybe you picked something you were comfortable doing.

I'm not a cutter, either. Not for lack of trying- I just can't make myself do it. I either hit myself, or burn, and usually burn lightly, at that (but not always, it depends on the reason). It's not the type or degree of self harm, sometimes, it's that you're willing to purposely damage yourself in some way.

The burning, I began doing after having hit myself for sometime, the opportunity was there, it was convenient, and I just decided to do it- then it became a habit.

Like you I'm an apparent late starter- I say apparent, because while I didn't seem to start hitting myself in earnest, until late 40s, thinking back, I can see where I was on the verge of being a self-harmer, at least a few times, back when I was late teens/early 20s, but it wasn't the addiction that it has become.
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Re: Why did I chose this type of self harm?

Postby Kdoc » Sun Jan 01, 2017 4:13 pm

There are lots of reasons people begin to self harm.

To get rid of intense emotions
To feel something
Attempts to punish self for something
Mastery over something/Control
To communicate to self
To communicate to others
To take care of oneself (care usually required afterwards)
To have others care for you
Endorphins are released when we experience pain

Those are just the first ones that come to mind. I'm sure there are others, as well.

I have spent much time researching methods. Ironic that you say you did a "great job." I wonder if you didn't experience a sense of accomplishment afterwards. I have at times and think sometimes I was just striving for that mastery or control over something.
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Re: Why did I chose this type of self harm?

Postby oceane » Mon Jan 09, 2017 7:25 pm

Interesting question! And not one I've really thought much about before now, but it's a fascinating thing. I cut and have never really self harmed in any other way with the exception of food restriction / self-starvation. I can't actually imagine myself harming myself in another way like burning or anything else.. I felt most comfortable with cutting for some reason.
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