Im a compulsive liar

Ive always been, but Ive always been told to tell the truth. I cant help but feel like i wanna lie sometimes. And most often I do.. Even about stupid stuff like who ate the last piece of pizza, who let the dogs out, did you do that thing today? etc.. Im always lieing i think though it goes hand in hand with my GAD as im always scared if i tell the truth something bads going to happen to me. Sometimes the lie i tell is even worse than the truth and i feel the need to tell it anyway lol.. does anyone feel this way?

There are a variety of reasons that Compulsive Liar Syndrome (CLS) sufferers lie. It sounds like you seem to fear disaster, others can enjoy the "thrill" of lying, the rush of getting away with it. I myself am a CLS sufferer, and I lie for 2 reasons. Like many CLS sufferers, I have an underlying disorder. I'm diagnosed with bipolar 2. When I have hypomanic episodes, my behaviour becomes erratic, impulsive and I can end up doing things I'm not proud of. So I lie, or at least, I used to. Eventually, the lies catch up with you. The small things that can "explain" your mood because you don't want to admit that you've lost control, to the big things that explain who you actually are, because you feel "nuts" when you realise what you've actually been thinking and up to. Finally, you have the exceptionally frustrating lies, the ones that you start to fire when the truth is being put in front of you, and you stick to the lies, or lie some more to cover it all. I used to lie like that to hide away the simple fact that I truly struggled with the truth, that I was behaving erratically and I can't control it. Medication is not the panacea that people think it is, and I have often been left worse off with many mood-stabilisers. Eventually, you have to hit rock bottom, and I lost 2 of my closest friends because of the complete breach of trust that they perceived. It's no fun trying to sell the "I can't help it" excuse, and whilst there are some who understand, there are others who either simply cannot/will not understand, or you may have left it until too late to get help. Either way, I'm currently undertaking CBT with a therapist who has proved to be very helpful and it has helped me understand the damage that lying inflicts, whatever the reason. I can't say that I have given up lying, but I try my hardest not to lie to my friends and loved ones. Occasionally I can't prevent the lies, so after I am more lucid, I will tell a lie, and weird as it sounds, will revert to "I'm sorry, that simply isn't true, I don't know why I said that." Frankly, it takes a lot of courage to admit you have a problem, and you will need a lot of support if you truly want to change. I would only say, if possible, avoid hitting rock bottom before you seek help, if you desire help that is. The reason I say that is because hitting rock bottom is a horrific experience, one that will leave you with serious bouts of guilt, depression, hopelessness and worthlessness. Thankfully I am very lucky, as I said, I finally managed to find a good therapist, and I have retained the love and support of at least some of my friends. Of course, none of this means that you should embrace over-honesty, as I wouldn't tell strangers that I am a bipolar 2 sufferer with CLS thrown in for good measure. It's more about trying to understand when and where lying is "appropriate".