Is this abuse?

My whole life, my father has taught me that being different or out of the norm was ridiculous and a cry for attention. He would also use "girl" as an insult, and would always try to catch me in a lie.
I developed depression about 2 years ago, I had fought through the first year and made 2 friends, who helped me feel better, feel happy.
Once I started forming my own ideas, and finding my own interests, my dad didn't like it. He started calling me more names, like moody- because I wouldn't join in on discussions about video games that didn't seem interesting to me, he called me emo when I started listening to hardcore/heavy metal music and wearing more black (to an extent. It was black skinny jeans).
Last year, my father hacked my skype and saw the messages that my friend had sent on my account, it was a fanfiction writing of a "smut" scene. Pretty much a sexual scene in a story written about a band/singer/any type of famous person. He called my mom, and told her what he read, and then yelled at me over the phone, saying only a slut says these things, and that he didn't raise a whore for a daughter, called me disgusting, a disappointment, and so many other horrible things. My friend had to help me stop crying and shaking. We spent the night deleting everything, and making new skype accounts.

My friends and I had some habits of making weird faces and noises at each other, so, these faces/noises being a habit, I did them around my dad and he would call me retarded or say "this is my daughter, she's challenged". He would always show more interest in my brothers life, and always try to spend time with my brother over me, because the things I enjoyed were too boring for him.
My brother wanted to spend more time with his friends, and that was all he would say. He could skip my fathers weekends by just saying "I'm going to my friends house". In the beginning I thought this was wonderful, until I wanted to get my lip pierced and my father stopped caring as much. He would insult me and my friends, call us all boring, weird, emo, call me stupid for piercing my lip. And, keep in mind, his response to my asking permission to get my lip pierced was "I don't care, you have to live with it."

Might I mention, he would never make an effort to show up to school talent shows, or the dance show that my friends and I had worked on all summer (When I was much younger) and put together ourselves. He never met my teachers, or went to school events, he never took me to birthday parties, held birthday parties for me-unless he regulated who was invited i.e my cousins and his friends kid.

I started skipping weekends, however, unlike my brother, wanting to spend time with my friends wasn't a valid reason. I had to have a teachers proof of a project, or a birthday to attend. Which was harder to come up with, and so I was stuck with being berated with insults for 2 days and a night.

One night, I was on skype with my friends (not too long ago, maybe 3 months) and my father came downstairs, and so I told my friends "My dad's here, hang on". Upon hearing this, my father started yelling at me, saying I was hiding something, and that if I was going to hide from him then I could just stay home, he didn't care at all. He told me I was ungrateful for all that he does, he told me I was useless and that I was going to s***. He said that if I wouldn't spend time with him, then I could make my friends pay for my stuff, make my friends buy me new laptops (which he never did in the first place) and take me to movies (again, he never did.) He made me cry so hard I had to sit in the other room for about 20 minutes so my brother wouldn't hear or see me. That was the second time I'd had serious suicidal thoughts and urges. He later apologized and said he loved me.

Then I asked for permission to dye my hair and he said "I told you not to get the stud in your lip, you did that. Why even ask, you do whatever you want anyway".

While the blue hair dye was fading, I couldn't correct the color so it faded to purple, then pink, then to blonde. Throughout this process, he would call my hair ugly, horrible, a mistake, and insult just about every aspect of it that he could.

Then, very recently, he yelled at me, saying me not liking me name (due to gender issues he still isn't aware of) was a slap in the face, and how disrespectful it was. He told me people would ask him what happened to me, why I freaked out and shaved the sides of my head, why I dyed my hair, and pierced my lip. He told me how beautiful I used to be before I became a "lying brat". He said I made up the fact that I was bullied, and that the teachers treated me worse than the other girls in my class. He told my I was lying about having deleted my other facebook account(that I made so he wouldn't stalk everything I do, I was afraid he would see me talking to a boy and yell at me). He called my tears (when I started crying at that point) fake, and told me they wouldn't get me any pity with him. He then later denied the whole thing, and said that he meant I can't change everything all of a sudden, and expect my parents to be okay with it. and told me he's sorry if it came off in the wrong way.

And after that weekend, I had a panic attack in 4th period at school because the vice principal told me my father had come in, and spoken to her about me, and that he wanted to meet me after school. I went to the washroom and calmed myself down, until 5 minutes before the end of the day bell rang, I started hyperventilating and shaking so much I couldn't hold my pencil. That's the third time I've had suicidal thoughts/urges.

I can't help but to compare to other kids who have it worse than me, who are getting hit,

I'm terrified to see him next weekend, and I don't know how to ask for help, I don't know what to call this. He scares me, and then apologizes, only to do it all over again. He insults my friends, my clothes, my makeup, my hair, everything he can.

He sounds mysogynistic. I guess it's a form of emotional abuse as it's carried on over years.