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Being obsessed with a person

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Being obsessed with a person

Postby thefool » Sat Oct 01, 2011 9:24 pm

Does anyone's life almost revolve around the love and obsession of one person ? I don't mean following their footsteps and hiding behind newspapers on park benches but loving them, empty and depressed without them, just revolving your life and thoughts around them and nothing can take it away. It's hard to move on, to grow and meet other people I used to be more that way just find someone else to take their place etc get to love them etc

There is one person i love with all my heart and can never stop thinking of & used to live for the moments i was with them and check their facebook all the time etc. I am lost and empty without them and find it hard to relate to friends the same way. One on one is great but now hating large social situations and being out too long. The thoughts and memories enter my mind along with the fears and painful feelings in the chest.

There is another person i have liked a lot before and sort of the same and try and love him as much to not feel so "in love" and down about the one person. But not on talking terms at the moment with him again either so it's hard and sad on my birthday lol :(
"what doesn't kill you makes you wish you were dead.
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby NEX » Sat Oct 01, 2011 9:54 pm

You Keep Finding Me....., First on Facebook and now on here.... :wink:

I have not had this situation.


But I can say

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! REBBA

Sincerely....

NEX

Image


"The thoughts and memories enter my mind along with the fears and painful feelings in the chest."


I Do not know how long it has been for you? I hope you Feel better soon....
You can't move a string by pushing it, you have to pull it.
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby Tea » Sun Oct 02, 2011 5:24 am

Happy belated birthday.

I have had this experience, yes. With a couple of different people. It is good to try to distract yourself as much as possible and connect with others to deal with this--that helped me.

However, I am currently on my way to becoming obsessed with my therapist...BAD IDEA.
silence is a text easy to misread
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby yoa » Sun Oct 02, 2011 6:10 am

I don't know you yet but HAPPY BIRTHDAY :)
yesterday will never be tomorrow
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby dejamelie » Sun Oct 02, 2011 8:42 pm

Yea.. I definitely experience this... I idolize and obsess about them and think about them every second of every day... and check heir facebook very hour (at least). I will sometimes know them well, or I will only be an acquaintance of theirs.. Sometimes I'll hate them because they dont show me the same attention I show them... but it's only because I have idolized them to such an extreme degree.
Its very hard for me.. these obsessions. It is certainly a pattern that has shown throughout my past. Currently I am trying to get over someone who I was obsessed with.. she used to be my roommate and we were very close. But this year we don;t seem to be as close and it's making me suicidal.

I have wondered how much of my obsessions are related to BPD. Because I know that idolization etc is.. but I seem to take it a step further with obsession.
"As the spirit wanes the form appears"
-Bukowski-
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby ShakyCore » Mon Oct 03, 2011 2:34 am

What you described sounds like me to a T (down to only feeling really comfortable in one-on-one interactions).
I tend to think of the obsession as an addiction. Romantic relationships take the pain away… so of course you can't get enough of it when you're in one and of course you go into a frenzy any time you don't get your daily "fix" (and go into a bad state of withdrawal any time a relationship ends). If you keep that in mind it can make things somewhat easier… of course, I doesn't actually solve the basic problems.

Btw, happy belated birthday :)
Gratitude can heal most wounds.

(What can I say… I don't like the word "all")
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby xenabaiche » Tue Oct 04, 2011 5:38 am

I have this same problem! My ex boyfriend. I left him a few years ago, and he finally had enough and rejected me. I've been obsessed with him since then. He drives me crazy. I dream about him every night. I just want him out of my head. He haunts me!!!! When I wake up, I miss him like crazy. But I really hate the guy, but I love him just enough to not be able to let go. It's so confusing.
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby rasp5erry » Tue Oct 04, 2011 7:19 am

I hear ya.

I'm still obsessed with this guy I met last year, though he has no clue how I feel about him still, since I cut off contact a few months ago. So in a sense I'm making sure my obsession doesn't reach sky-high proportions (since I don't see or talk to him anymore). But at the same time, I can't stop thinking about him. Nor do I even try.

It's really bad when your whole life revolves around another person, when seeing or not seeing them can make or break your day. At this point, most people would say it's time to find a new hobby. I say just ride it out. The fire will consume itself at one point, and die.
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby distortedgirl » Tue Oct 04, 2011 9:11 pm

Yes, I know that. I experienced it 3 times, with a TV person just for 6 months, with a closest friend for 4 years, and with my supervisor for 2 years. The last two gave me lots of problems and huge pain. I learned how to avoid being obsessed with a person, but I still need lots of effort to avoid it.
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Re: Being obsessed with a person

Postby dejamelie » Wed Oct 05, 2011 12:42 am

distortedgirl wrote:I learned how to avoid being obsessed with a person, but I still need lots of effort to avoid it.


What do you do now to avoid becoming obsessed? This is something I really need to work on..
"As the spirit wanes the form appears"
-Bukowski-
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